Normal 3 month old?

[Writerz34]

Hello - my 3.5 month old cries basically whenever we're in a noisy social situation. She's fine seeing family but hates baby classes etc. I think as they are too loud. She also gets scared easily and startles or cries (sometimes by me laughing / coughing etc).

We have ASD in the family so I'm wondering if it could be that, or if it's normal baby behaviour (though she definitely cries a lot more than the other babies!). Maybe she's just sensitive!

I don't think it's colic as it started getting worse around 2 months and shows no signs of improving now at 14 weeks. She's also recently started hating the pram and wants to be in the carrier.

she sleeps ok - wakes 2-4 times in the night which I think is pretty standard for her age (breastfeeding). She definitely gets very overtired a lot and it can take a lot to get her to sleep.

It's normal - not all babies are like that but lots are and it doesn't mean ASD necessarily.

My dd and I both hated baby classes. She'd scream and I'd want to scream too. They are so banal and cheery and loud and, frankly, pointless in terms of child development under (say) 9m.

She also used to sob in fear whenever my (extremely gentle, never raises his voice) dh sneezed. He does performative man-sneezes. Sometimes it even woke her up from a nap - he had to get into the habit of going out into the garden to sneeze!

Now she's 3yo and no sign of ASD yet

Normal - my Dc hated the loud cheery baby classes @Mummy08m

But she loved the stay and plays at my local childrens centre as she could explore the new toys at her own speed - and far quieter than “mad monkey music” or whatever your local cheery ott classes are called.

Id look around at different baby classes as I’ve found my childrens centre a godsend

Yes mine was exactly like this but it didn't last too long, he is 7m now and doesn't get upset by loud noises anymore. If you enjoy them I would recommend carrying on with classes, it's good for the babies to get used to noise and other children, mine absolutely loves his now and it's so lovely to see him interacting with the other babies there!

Totally normal, babies have different temperaments and personalities and will like different things. 3 month old babies can be particularly sensitive to certain noises and things so please don't worry. Your DD sounds like my son who was quite a high needs sensitive baby, he is now 4 and so lovely and empathetic to other people's feelings, no sign of ASD

If you want to get out a bit and chat to other mums without overwhelming her, perhaps try things like buggy walks, library rhyme time, and church/community hall type baby groups with mats down on the floor, some toys, and tea and biscuits for the parents. I didn't do any loud, cheery baby classes when mine were tiny (because they also tend to be expensive, and it seemed like a waste at that age), but we had a nice little weekly schedule of more relaxed groups.

At that age, they have difficulty distinguishing between sounds they "should" listen to (your voice) and background noise. So a lot of background noise is very tiring for them. Some just shut everything out, some get overtired. If she's not enjoying the classes, I'd cut them out for 3 months. She might well enjoy them when noise is less difficult for her.