Just need to get it out. No telling me off please. Can't handle a fight today

[NAB3wishesfor2008]

DS did something accidently that hurt DD.

DD screamed and cried. Would not shut up. She is a crier and a screamer just lately. Went on for ages. DH and I shouted. [bad parents]

DD ripped off her border because she couldn't get her own way.

I said something horrible.

How do we get her to stop unnecessary screaming and crying? And the volume!! Have a head ache now.

Sad sad

Yoga. You're just having a bad time, it'll get better.

how old is she?

Poor Nab - bad day which is nearly over. This too will pass!

She is 4 1/2

I feel really bad

Had a lovely start to the day

Don't know what to do when she cries so loud and won't stop. I do know that if I said chocolate she would stop immediately!

my dd has been like this for a while, she's 6 and just beginning to grow out of it

ignore it

if she's hurt, give her appropriate comfort (whatever you normally do- rub it better, cuddle, kiss)

then give her a tissue and get up and walk away

for some bizarre reason, my dd cannot stop screaming unless she has something to wipe her eyes

Wine. (i have hysterics prone drama queen dd, 222).

Awful isn't it. DS1 (3 years) does this every so often and usually over the most silly things (to us anyway) and I have on the odd occasion shouted at him in frustration very ashamed of myself for that
As for getting her to stop, I figure that with DS when he reaches that point he's effectively lost control and needs adult help calming himself, sometimes thats time out in his room if he's been naughty (gently placed there with a dummy) and/or picked up and cuddled and rocked with no words just kisses and coos. Once he's got control again we can then talk about whatever triggered it.

Next time she does this I will pick her up and cuddle her until she stops.

Thanks everyone and thanks for not shouting at me. Don't think I could have coped with that today.

That sounds like a good idea, Nab - you can talk to her when she's calmed down, and it's a good strategy for getting both of you calm quickly. God, I should hope no-one would shout at you for that - everyone has bad days.

Walk out of the room - leave them to scream - go to the toilet whatever. Count to 20 (I usually have a bit of chocolate which is why I'm fat so I don't recommend that bit) - walk back into the room and say, "Right, cuddle time. Lets all sit on the sofa together and hug each other." And do just that. Sit down, kiss and cuddle each other.

Works a treat with my family.

Oh yes wine works a treat here too.

I've shouted at my DD and DS this morning and felt guilty, god nobody is perfect. They push and push and push ...

I agree with what another poster said give reasonable comfort, when you think she should have calmed down walk away maybe saying "I'm looking for a helper to ...." to distract.

It's HORRIBLE when they do that and can make you feel quite desperate.

Through long and bitter experience I have found that these things can help:

1. pick the screamer up and carry them to another place in the house. (The younger they are the easier this distraction works) 2)speak quietly and cuddle them 3)don't try to sort out what happened to start them screaming until peace has been restored. Then let each child tell their story and ask if they can think of a way to make things better. 4)open a nice bottle of wine and pour yourself a large glass 5)tell yourself what a wonderful mum you are for not losing your rag and that you should be employed in the diplomatic corps.

LOL at number 5

Had the wine. Suxh a light weight I feel tipsy!!!

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I will try that. Thank you. She can be a drama queen but maybe I should let her have her moment and it might all stop sooner.

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