Worried about baby’s attachment

[Sleepysaurus2]

DS is nearly 8 months and seems to be unbothered whether he is with me or anyone else. He seems to be happy for other people to hold him. When DD was his age she would cry whenever anyone else held her and would cry when I left the room. They do have very different temperaments and DS is generally more chill than DD was. I haven’t left DS with anyone else yet as he is BF. However, it does hurt a bit when he is seemingly unbothered by who he is with. It makes worry that he isn’t securely attached, especially as he is second born so therefore gets far less one to one time with me compared with DD. Anyone else experienced this?

How mobile is he?? Quite often babies demonstrate more attachment once more mobile. That is not to say they feel more attachment then, but they show it more.

Mine have never shown any real attachment to me, but they’re attached if that makes any sense at all! Admittedly I have twins, but they’ve never given a shiny shit about being left. I’ve checked with numerous HV/HCP (thanks pnd) and I was told it’s normal.

I’d read that being happy with others is a sign of a secure attachment, because they know you are constant and will always reappear.

I have a professional background and this is true.

Yes @buckingmad I have read about this too. I suppose it just makes me wonder why DD was so different and cried whenever anyone else held her. I can’t help worrying that I’ve done something wrong by one of them!

Mine were the same, dd was very very clingy and I couldn't go to the toilet. DS currently 9 months and could not care in the slightest .
I figure they're just all different. Don't over think it, there's always enough to feel guilty about as a mother without finding more.

Please don't worry. It's all normal.

@Sleepysaurus2 all babies are different. My mum had it the other way around, brought us all up the same but 3 of us were pretty independent and one was very very clingy. The fact you care enough to worry about it shows you’re doing a fab job xx

I honestly believe this is temperment/nature than anything you have done or not,what is your daughter like now ?

@Mrsjayy she is quite cautious and more of an observer in new situations or around new people. She’s also still quite clingy to me at times. If I’m around she tends to only want to play with me and only wants me to put her to bed etc although she is very comfortable at nursery and staying at my parents house. So maybe you’re right and it’s just temperament.

thanks everyone

My baby was like that I took it to be a good thing being happy with people other than us