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Scared to do it all again newborn stage

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Milliemilly · 29/08/2023 11:27

You’d think I wouldn’t be as my son is 21mo, so he’s not that old, his newborn stage is still fresh in my mind.

I wasn’t depressed I was very anxious though and of course exhausted. I remember not sleeping purposely as I was scared something would happy, the ‘witching hour’/colic, the sad newborn cry that was sometimes relentless.

His first year was kind of hard in a sense of me and DH reached breaking point, we argued, we disagreed and I’d say considered splitting up. We just felt so distant and didn’t get into our flow until DS was 8-9mo, and then fully at the age of 1 we felt closer and those months of straight work made us stronger.

I’m scared having DD will take us back to that place. I’m scared we’ll divide. I’m scared I’ll be so anxious. And all of this witb DS being present I’m scared he’ll notice and I don’t want that I want everything as normal and happy as possible for him :(

Is it normal to be this scared to have a 2nd baby and think - how will I do this?!

also I know I love my daughter and will when I meet her, but I do look at my DS and the love I feel for him I think how can I ever love anyone like you? He’s the little one who stole my heart and made me a mum. Is this a normal feeling??

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