Where does baby sleep

[BudgetBuster]

This might be a stupid question so apologies in advance. But newborn to 6 months+ it is recommended baby sleeps in your room. I get this. But where does baby sleep say if you put them down at 8pm, are you expected to stay in the room from then? Or do you put them down in the living room where you are and transfer them later?

Either of those options. I did the latter, 20+ years ago but DDil does the former.

They stay with you, so yes either downstairs with you or you go upstairs with them. Helps if you have TV upstairs, I watched a lot of TV in bed!

In the very early weeks I slept whenever they slept, day or night. Once bigger they slept downstairs until I wanted to go up. In reality they were either feeding all evening or asleep on me so it made little difference. But depends if you get one that can be put down. DD had to be held and was EBF anyway so cluster fed from about 5pm-10pm anyway.

She didn’t go to bed on her own until well over 1.

Thanks both. I was trying to work out if I needed a moses basket and next to me crib. I think I'd like to stay downstairs until at least 10pm as DH will be working all day and I might lose my mind with baby all day and then going upstairs as soon as he's home 😂

0-4 months I put him to sleep in the living room with us and did another feed when we went to bed.

4-7 months put him to sleep in our room but check on every 20 minutes and had monitor on.

7 months - own room.

Sometimes you'll be tired enough for bed at 8!

Mine tended to feed and snooze on my lap in the evening, occasionally attempting to put them inmoses basket in the same room. Telly doesn't really wake most babies, they're used to very loud digestion noises!

Then they'd come up to bed when I went.

The rationale is supposedly that hearing you breathe helps to remind them to breathe.

• 0-4 months in their moses basket in the dimmest corner of the lounge before a feed at 10pm then up to bed with us.
• 4 months+ in their own room from 7pm with the monitor and also a dreamfeed as we were going to bed.

The advice is you’re supposed to stay in the room until 6 months but that didn’t work for any of us and we felt comfortable making the change at 4 months. You’ll find what works best for you once baby is here e.g. lots of people swear by cosleeping but that isn’t recommended either.

I used to put my little ones down in a Moses basket or a bouncer in the room I was in until about 5 months and after that I founded they needed peace and dark and put them in the bedroom with a monitor and checked on them regularly

I put my baby in her own crib upstairs with a video baby monitor on her.

If she slept downstairs with me, the dog woke her up barking at a cat or postman.

I also put baby in her own room overnight from 3 weeks old. She has always slept wonderfully well, as have we all!

Best of luck OP

Baby should be in the same room as you until 6 months. We cuddled baby during the evening but you could use a carrycot or Moses basket in the same room.

Just to correct a PP the NHS no longer advise against cosleeping, instead offering guidelines on how to do so safely.

Very similar to most other posters, asleep downstairs with us until our bedtime 0-4 months.
Then in the basket in our room with monitor on 4-6 months around half 7/8 then into his own room at that time 6 months onwards.

We didn’t need a moses basket downstairs, we just took it in turns to hold her or put her on the baby play mat. I wouldn’t buy one until you see if you need it @BudgetBuster

But a sling is defined worth having so you can be hands free. I used that a lot.

When they fitted into the moses basket they would go to sleep in the living room and then we would carry them uptairs.

When they moved into the cot (in our room till 6 months) they were went down there with a monitor. We would then join them in the room when time for our bed but not before.

It depends on the baby. Both of mine hated being downstairs after 8pm from eight weeks, the slightest light/noise/non-bedroom atmosphere made them grouchy. DD was a terrible sleeper and PFB so I happily went to bed with her. DS slept like an angel but I was knackered from a shit pregnancy and having two, so I didn’t mind going up with him and reading on my Kindle/snuggling/occasionally clusterfeeding, while DP did all the domestic chores. I got the better end of the bargain. I did feel a bit “in baby prison” from five months when he started wanting to go to bed at 6.30pm, and by that point his sleep was terrible so I needed an early night but also some respite, but it was a really short window of life. We used a sleep consultant at six months and now he goes to bed at 6.30 and I stay downstairs. It doesn’t last long, the “supposed to stay with them” era. I sort of miss it: just me and my baby in the dark.

Mine would feed/sleep on me downstairs until I was ready to go to bed. The might have been passed to DH if I needed to get up and do something. It’s actually a really nice time.

After around 4 months when baby didn’t want to feed for as long in the evenings and their sleep starts to change we put them in the cot in our room and watched something/chilled in bed until we were ready to sleep.

From 6 weeks of mine would ever sleep if there was anything else going on in the same room. They went in their cot upstairs in a dark room for naps and bedtime and we got on with other things downstairs (with baby monitor). They also grew out of the moses basket at about 8 weeks old and went straight in a cot in their own room.

No need to be in the same room as them all the time if they are in a secure and safe cot.

The reason for the advice to be in the same room is to reduce SIDS (cot death) risk.

A monitor won't reduce the risk of SIDS, they need to hear someone's breathing in the same room. You wouldn't see them stop breathing and a heartrate monitor would pick up a problem, not prevent it.

Obviously it's a qualified risk and people make their own choices about co-sleeping, smoking, drinking, second hand mattresses etc that can also affect SIDS risk and it's still a tiny risk if you don't follow the guidelines.

However - that's why they advise being in the same room for six months.

https://www.lullabytrust.org.uk/safer-sleep-advice/room-sharing/

Guidelines would say baby is always to be with someone until 6 months so sleep downstairs with you until you are going up to bed. The reality is that this doesn't always work best, if you have a monitor on and are able to check in on baby it should be fine.

Thanks all. I know baby should be with me until 6months, I just wasn't sure if it was normal to let them sleep on you or in a moses basket in the lounge. Thanks for all your advice!

My eldest, we took up to bed and then DH and I say up together in bed and watched TV on the iPad. Was a very lovely time. Went to sleep when we fancied it. Some times we'd snuggle with DD, sometimes she's sleep in her next to me.

My boys were hard to settle for the first 4 months or so DH would take eldest up to bed, I'd get settled on sofa with boys and watch TV. DH would come down and join me later, then I'd take them up to bed around 10pm.

Colicky first baby cluster fed or screamed all evening then went to bed with me then screamed some more and did some co-sleeping.

Unicorn second baby slept in her moses basket in the lounge all evening then stayed asleep as she was carried up two flights of stairs to her crib in our room at our bedtime where she slept through or woke for one quick feed before re-settling.

Both of mine slept on our chests in the evenings before we went upstairs to cosleep. A video monitor or safe cot won't stop SIDS so it's best to keep them with you, and it's very cute!