Spending baby gift money

[NameChange547]

Friend 1 gave friend 2 money for baby - £20. Friend 2 is struggling financially and used money for grocery shop (including nappies and next size up vests, but baby-related spend probably not totalling the full £20). Friend 1 is annoyed and talking behind back about friend 2, saying money was for baby and should have been used to buy something specifically for baby or put in savings account for baby. Friend 2 says she needs the money and she spends far more than this on baby all the time - can be considered a spend in proxy for times she has bought clothes etc.

Who is right?

Friend 2 is right . Friend one gave a gift and doesn't get to dictate what friend 2 does with it.

None of friend 1s business when the moneys handed over. She’s Essen spent it on baby, £20 doesn’t go far! Knowing her friends struggling and used it on essentials for her and the baby, how can she be so annoyed? I wouldn’t even ask my friend what it was spent on. Nappies and some vest would’ve swallowed more than half that £20. If she’s so annoyed she should’ve bought a gift rather than money. Friend 1 is being unreasonable

How on earth does friend 1 know what the money was spent on?!

But friend 2 is right, it’s a token amount of money and can be spent however friend 2 wants

It would be different it grandparents had given a grand for savings but it’s £20

Friend 1 asked what she had bought with the money and Friend 2 was honest.

So basically friend 1 wanted to give a gift specifically for the baby but couldn't be arsed to think of something. If you give cash you don't get to dictate how it's spent.

Its a shame really because if friend 2 was struggling financially then cash is much more useful than a pretty little outfit or a gift voucher. She was probably really grateful to receive it, and not have to worry how she was gonna buy the bits she needed.

Friend 1 isn't much of a friend.

If friend 1 wanted it spent on something specially for the baby, she should have just bought it herself.

Friend 1 sounds really nasty actually. Giving cash because she couldn’t be arsed to go buy a proper present then trying to dictate how it’s spent and talking about Friend 2 behind her back telling everyone about her money problems.

Thanks everyone, good to know people agree. Friend 1 came to me bitching and I stood by Friend 2, but the other friend we were with said she agreed with Friend 1 so I was worried it was just me!

Maybe the true friends should have been aware how their mate was struggling and offered support not bitching well done for standing up for her.

When you give money you cannot dictate how the receiver spends it. Friend 2 used the gift for essentials which also benefit the baby, even if indirectly. Friend 1 has no cause for complaint.

If I was giving money for a baby I would expect the money was going to the baby (like a gift or save it) So, I understand why Friend 1 would be a bit upset. My mum also give us money (for the baby) when my daughter was born, and I put it on a saving account for her. It's her money, not mine, regardless how useful it would be for us now.
But! If Friend 2 is struggling financially, she should have said something before she spent it all. Like telling Friend 1 that it will go to something like diapers and asking if it was ok. It could have been a simple conversation and now it's blown out of proportion.
I personally think it's strange to spend the money that was given specifically to your daughter.