Going against a court order

[Kkcc2]

Currently 50/50 child arrangements order in place. We are allowed one full week holiday with our daughter a year. Notice has to be given by 31st jan. Daughters father messaged on that date telling me he’d like her for 10 days in august for a uk holiday (his weekend into a week holiday) I agreed. Messaged again on 29/06 saying he was booking a holiday abroad that evening and wanted to confirm the august dates. To which I agreed (in the best interest of our daughter, as the court would say) I was yet to be confirmed any details. In the order it says as soon as a holiday is booked the parent is to let the other know. He’s told daughter multiple times about weekends away, holiday during half term and it never happened so I assumed he was staying at home for his august ‘holiday time’. Daughter had mentioned going on a plane to turkey but she’s just turned 7 so didn’t want to rely on that information. On pick up day I was given a piece of paper to sign to agree to let my daughter leave the country later that day. If I didn’t sign, he would chance it anyway. I messaged asking for details of this holiday and was sent a message 30 minutes before the plane was taking off to tell me he’s taking her to America. Where do I stand on this? I am happy she’s gone on holiday but America is a bit extreme especially when he didn’t tell me and he reasoning was it was a surprise for her and his partners children? He’s also given me two specific times I can contact her, as long as he is able to find some Wi-Fi. One being an afternoon, the other would be 11.30pm uk time (I have a newborn daughter and a toddler). He’s very to every detail of the court order and he’s the one who put it in place. I just need to know who I can contact and if there’s anything I can get done about this as I’m very uncomfortable with how far she’s gone and the fact I’ve only been told when there’s nothing that could be done about it.

@Notamum12345577 Her Dad is dead. Thanks for that!

@Caprisunny Oh yes I would! The court would be taking a dim view of the father going AGAINST what is written in the order and deliberately causing conflict. How is that in the best interests of the child?

@yogasaurus What on earth makes me think what? The court would be taking a dim view of the father going against what is written in the existing order and deliberately causing conflict. How is that in the best interests of the child?

Alfie the family courts are busy dealing with cases where children are being removed from their family or parents are being denied contact. Believe me, they won't take kindly to what they will see as a trivial matter of someone not sharing the exact details of a holiday being brought before them, even if it's written into a CAO that those details should be shared. It might not seem fair but the ex knew very well he could do this with no comeback for the OP.

This

I would've taken my child home again. No way would she be crossing the world without me!

His court order says he can, you’d be the one going against it

Details can just mean dates from and to

What is the actual wording

There would be no reason a court would stop him taking the child ‘half way across the world’ without you.

A court would also take a very dim view of someone who also thinks they get to dictate milage of a trip. And to have it addressed you would need to go back to court.

Besides which, Op didn’t enforce the court order. She didn’t know where they were going. She signed the permission slip without knowing the destination. Just a vague idea it might be Turkey.

By the time the Op knew is was the US the child was in the airport. So if your child was already at the gate, how would you have stopped them going exactly?

He might be breaking the court order that doesn’t mean the court will side with the parent that says the US is to far

Ime courts very rarely enforce what they've ordered. Even if what they've ordered has been expert testified as to being essential for the childs wellbeing.

Your ex in an arse. But its unlikely you can do much about it

I have similar in my order - he was highly abusive. He must inform me of all flight numbers and accommodation etc prior to consent being given. Week maximum etc

the contact time for contact is British hours eg if you normally phone at 6 pm which is what it states in my order - so you need to take back control.

scan and clipboard paste the order and where he has broken it as a breakdown explain you can not and nor is it reason for you to phone at 11.30 pm and therefore it is either 6 pm U.K. time or 2 pm in the afternoon or whatever is reasonable, I normally state really unreasonable, reasonable and court order and let him pick that way ge feels he is in control.

eg I can’t meet you on J2 of the m25 at 8am this morning at the services as per the court order as the m25 is shut. And screen shot travel report. I will therefore meet you close by at x postcode at 8.30 am - he responds saying no I want the a10 at Cambridge - I reiterate reasonable request and then state if he doesn’t agree I will return to Birmingham or wherever.

in this particular case you should not of signed or agreed.

and now it creates a precedent

email as I suggest and say you will expect a phone call at 6 pm U.K. time on Tuesdays or Thursdays etc

Also a court won’t care about the destination unless it is on a country not approved for travel

I’m sorry for yours and hers loss. However, you brought up the scenario, I was replying