8 week old not meeting milestones

[Confusedmum32]

I have an 8 week old daughter that isn't meeting her developmental milestones. She has a very hard time keeping her head up (havent given a lot of tummy time until recently) and rarely does it and isn't wanting to engage much. She does occasionally smile and will sometimes talk and stare back. She was hospitalised at 6 weeks due to being sick. Doctor wasn't sure what it was and she was flushed with antibiotics which made her worse and gave her thrush. Fast forward to day and she's better but still having issues getting her to eat enough. Has anyone ever expected this? Has your child gained more neck/head control later on?

Ask your doctor or HV, but I have to say it wouldn't have even occurred to me to worry about this kind of thing at 8 weeks! At eight weeks both of mine were very much in the doing absolutely nothing but sleeping and eating stage. I'm sure your daughter is fine xx

This sounds normal to me OP - they don't gain head and neck control until 3-4 months. Try not to worry.

I also have an 8 week old (second baby)- what you're describing sounds absolutely normal! There aren't really any 'milestones' at 8 weeks old and she sounds like she's doing fab to be smiling etc at this stage. Proper head control won't come til much later. Don't worry 😁

My DD didn't smile until 11 weeks and didn't make any talking noises until some time after that, 3-4 months I think.

8 weeks is on the early side and I wouldn't worry about the talking/smiling. Tummy time is great plus lots of talking /facial expressions/eye contact. If you are worried see your hv but it all sounds pretty normal.

I didn't realise I was supposed to do tummy time and never did it until 9 weeks old. I can't remember how many weeks they were when they held their head but think it was somewhere between 12 weeks and 16 and later than normal because I had delayed it accidently.
As for sickness....my baby was sick all the time. He had reflux issue so had to have special milk to keep it heavy in his tummy and constantly caught every bug. Most babies are like this so wouldn't worry.

18 week old here. We don’t do any tummy time on the floor due to reflux, however I recently read that time sitting upright on your chest also counts as tummy time as it does encourage them to engage the neck muscles! That’s literally all we have ever done as “tummy time”. At 8 weeks my baby was slightly behind milestones (maybe 1 week behind), however now he has caught up. They all develop at different times.

how much is baby taking? Is your HV concerned about weight gain? Hopefully the HV can help!

I don't want to sound all "in my day" but in my day we didn't do tummy time, and I don't see many teens/young adults around unable to hold their heads up. Well, I do. But not for want of tummy time....

all babies develop at their own pace. I really recommend watching an episode of the show Bluey called Baby Race.

in the mean time, your baby sounds perfectly normal, but if you’re worried you can chat to the nurse at the first vaccinations.

She's still very much "floppy" though. Should I be concerned at that? Like she moves her head side to side but when I pull her to sit up her head just flops back. Apparently she's meant to have some kind of control and be able to stable it kinda.

I'm pretty sure 8 weeks is incredibly early to be able to control her head. When you say "milestones" where are you finding them? Anyway-do you have a drop in baby clinic or something you can take her to for reassurance. It's perfectly natural for you to be so worried particularly as she's been poorly enough to need antibiotics.

Sorry, I know you mean to be kind but this is total bollocks. 3 month olds can sit supported with a straight spine and should be beginning to reach for objects with an open hand ( called " batting)- this is the age of the baby gym. 4 month olds are sitting supported at the pelvis ( so on your lap) also rolling. This are averages but to suggest head control only starts at 3 months is wrong and falsely reassuring.

Please don't pull her to sit up. She's still extremely young and you should be fully supporting her neck and head.

Was told to slightly pull her up to encourage her to use it.

I don’t think they are expected to have much head/neck control at this point are they?? My 8 week old DD has been referred to pediatrics as she isn’t following things around with her eyes (although she is doing social smiles so can presumably see!) the GP seemed impressed with her head control though suggesting it wasn’t usual to have such good head control at 8 weeks. What I’ve taken from this is that they all do things in their own time some things sooner maybe some things later (and hopefully my DD’s eyes are ok!!) DD1 didn’t walk til she was 20 months but was an early talker, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with her

No need to be concerned. She will get there eventually. You have given very good reasons for why she may not have developed it yet and to be honest 8 weeks is too early to be able to judge her development. Give her some time she has barely been here. Lol.

That's why they do the checks at certain ages. 9 months and 2 years i think it is. They send you a questionnaire for you to fill in with some skills you can practise with them and it is all about exposure. At that point if she can't control her head and neck muscles it might be a concern but even then they will advise you on exercises you can do to strengthen it. They are born with no muscle control and literally have to learn control from the head down. The more you give them opportunity to practise through tummy time and play the more likely they will develop it. Just remember that it is not a race. Each baby will develop at their own pace and to be honest even if she is ahead or behind a month or two as long as she gets there eventually who even cares. Babies develop fast. They may not be doing anything for a few months then learn 3 skills in a short amount of time.

My three all hated lying on their stomachs and tummy time wasn’t a ‘thing ‘ 23 years ago . I just avoided putting them on tummy and they are all absolutely normal adults. Am sure developmental checks are later for a reason…because babies all developed at slightly different times when very young.

DD hated tummy time and just lay on her front screaming her head off and making no effort to lift herself up. We had to have the HV do a follow up visit as they were concerned she wasn't meeting this milestone. She still hated being on her tummy until she figured out how to get up and crawl at 7 months and she was then walking at 10 months. No harm done to her development, she just didn't want to do tummy time!

8 weeks does seem very young so try not to worry, just offer her lots of opportunities to strengthen her head control. DD wouldn't tolerate being on the floor but was much happier on my tummy or being flown like an aeroplane!

You aren't factoring in that she's been unwell. Her resources have gone to fighting the infection, and she probably hasn't been moving her head much and developing her neck muscles.

Honestly there sounds like nothing you need to worry about, but if you're worrying on it there is never any harm in seeing your GP or HV to put your mind at rest.

One of mine did tummy time on my lap, my knees, on my chest. Tummy time really isn't comfortable for some babies, especially if they have reflux.

Honestly op your baby is an individual- just relax and enjoy. Scrap off tummy time or any books or info on milestones, it's all a load of crap and pressure.

My eldest did very little until 18 months and now at 5 he runs into school happy as Larry, glowing reviews at parents evening etc. If I'd told u he did everything early as a baby you'd have no reason to not believe me.

Please try to relax as when they are older there are real things to worry about and you'll look back on this and regret it.

Sorry I realise my wording wasn't great as I'm so tired, but I hope it came across ok. Please just relax and enjoy your baby, I didn't even realise milestones were a thing at 8 weeks (still don't) and I have 2 healthy children who are doing well.

They're still fairly potato like at this age OP

If you lay your baby on your chest, tummy down, can they slightly lift their head and slightly turn it side to side? It's a slight movement. You should still be offering a hand for head support when holding them.

Currently feeding DC2 8wo. Your baby sounds fine. I’d recommend watching the Baby Race episode of Bluey.

She moves her head slightly up and side to side. Not a great deal though.