I've not posted for many years so I've no idea if this is going in the right place with this forum.
How do I get people to understand my sons diagnosis of autism and what it means to him ?
He has recently finally had his diagnosis confirmed after a long frustrating road of years wondering why he behaved in certain ways .
I have found people wanting to try and be helpful with their advise but I'm getting so frustrated putting my point across.
My son is 12 and the way it has affected him is that he never smiles , never shows facial expressions so he permanently looks unhappy .
His voice is monotone their is no emotion to anything he says .
He just wants to be alone after school he takes himself off to his bedroom and doesn't want to connect with the family or anyone thing else.
I've tried to persuade him to join clubs he doesn't want to. I've tried everything to get him to invite friends around to the house he doesn't and its only on a very rare occasion that he will ask someone around. I worry myself sick constantly about his lack of interaction .
I look at him and my heart breaks it feels as if the world and life is passing him by.
I see groups of boys laughing and chatting out and about enjoying their childhood.
I've asked what I should do and been told that even though he doesn't look happy I should let him do his own thing because it's what he is most comfortable with but I worry constantly it's not the right thing.
Then on top of having to feel like I am failing him I get well meaning friends telling me he will turn out a loner.
That they wouldn't have it and would force their children to join clubs etc .
I feel like I'm being judged I am trying so hard but what I cannot get across properly is that,my sons brain is wired in a completely differant way, that he struggles so much if I put him in those situations he gets extreme anxiety he hates crowds of people etc .
Interestingly he has settled into high school well and Ive been told he is a polite boy he has a very small group of friends but has no interest in carrying on any interaction after school.
It's nearly the end of the school holidays and he has spent almost all of it in his bedroom I've tried to encourage him so much but he just refuses it gets upset if I push it .
I wish my friends could understand that there are more struggles he has to deal with on a daily basis that they will ever realise.
Has anyone here got any advise or been in this situation how can I get my point across I'm struggling myself .
Just to also say he has 3 siblings all grown up and left home and they were very outgoing social butterflies so this has been really hard to understand.
I guess I just want him to be happy because that's all that matters,the constant worry is I'm doing the wrong thing especially when pointed out by others who are well meaning
Thankyou if you had the patience to read all of that I would appreciate any advice .