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Kids party

7 replies

sydneyinsummer · 16/08/2023 05:07

Currently away with DS and some friends. Trip was being cut short today as ds has a friends birthday party tomorrow which is being held in a local park. Ds is begging to stay on the trip longer (and tbh I want to too). This is possible as we are staying with friends and could stay until the end of the week. Problem is, this is a good friend of ds (they are 6) and I've agreed to go to the party. Is it unreasonable to not travel back for 2 hours in the park?! I feel very guilty as I hate letting people down and would never say yes and cancel last minute but we are having such a lovely time and it seems a shame to cut the trip short.

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yellowgecko · 16/08/2023 05:59

What type of party? Village hall? Organised fun?

If the latter, there's usually minimum numbers and a price per head. Eg our local soft play is £15per child, minimum 12 kids.
It's highly unlikely they'll fill the spot at late notice and they've wasted money on his spot.

Also you've committed, regardless of venue. IMO it's rude to pull out at the last minute (barring illness). How would your DS feel if it was his birthday and his guest couldn't be bothered to go because they were having more fun elsewhere?

Good opportunity for a life lesson here OP...

yellowgecko · 16/08/2023 06:00

Sorry just seen local park. I'll stick with the 'life lesson' comment!! ☺️

Memam · 16/08/2023 06:19

A tough decision and, of course, it's really up to how your decision will leave you feeling. To some people, it won't be a tough decision: you just 'do you' and don't worry what others think. You're having a great time away so why spoil the good times you're having 'and even DS doesn't want to attend'.

For me, I would go to the party because your son RSVPd that he'll attend which means his friend's parent/s will have paid for your son's share assuming a venue has been booked and your son's been added to their food bill costs, the party bag costs, etc. Again, to some hosts, these costs might be relatively small or insignificant while to others, they might be significant.

I'd also lean towards having DS attend because although you're having a good time, such great moments in life are aplenty, but your DS's friend will only ever celebrate his 6th (or 7th birthday?) once in his life. So to teach your DS about being a good friend and avoid lessons on flaking, albeit at such a young age, is still a good thing.

There's also DS's friendship with his 'close friend' the birthday boy. You would potentially annoy his mum who'd want the best for her DS's party. As some might point out, how would you feel if the shoe were on the other foot?

Personally, I would only stay where you are if you know for sure that the host and her DS wouldn't mind, i.e. that they're an extremely laid back family and that enough of Birthday Boy's other close friends were attending to soothe your DS's absence.

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Totaly · 16/08/2023 06:24

Unfortunate summer holiday parent understand people are away on holidays. Most tend to do a July gathering with school friends or a September one.

I wouldn’t cut short a holiday for a 6 year old.

If it’s a park - I would apologise and offer to take the child on a playdate for his birthday next week.

Memam · 16/08/2023 06:27

I've also just picked up on it being in a local park. I completely understand your dilemma here, but much like teaching our kids how to delay gratification in life, we also need to teach them when to cut a good time short. If you stay where you are, DS might learn that it's OK to flake last minute because something better came along or he's simply having too much of a good time.

I would only stay if I could stomach calling the host to explain that DS couldn't make it and then invite her son around for a mini celebration with a cake provided by you to keep their friendship on good terms (or something similar).

PuttingDownRoots · 16/08/2023 06:27

Imagine if everyone had something "better" to do. Poor kid could end up with no friends at his party...

You committed. They planned for you being there.

Positive41 · 16/08/2023 08:48

PuttingDownRoots · 16/08/2023 06:27

Imagine if everyone had something "better" to do. Poor kid could end up with no friends at his party...

You committed. They planned for you being there.

Exactly this.

Imagine if everyone decided they couldn't be bothered honouring an invite they had accepted. I don't care if the child is 6, in fact that makes it worse. The poor child could be sat there with no friends turning up. Are you ok with this?

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