Screen time for 7&8 year old

[woollencats]

DS8 and DS7 have each other to play with and get on quite well. They have toys and a fair sized garden. No TV in their room as they share and it would cause arguments. DS8 loves his screens and would watch TV and have his Switch all day if I let him. DS7 still likes his toys/books.

This summer, I've been trying a Switch session in the morning and one before dinner. He still asks for it at other times and asks for the TV on about 4 times a day (he is an early riser so watches some before breakfast).

So they watch:
TV for about 45 mins in the morning
Switch 30 mins after breakfast
Out/garden - we try and get out in the morning to run off some steam
Another TV programme when we get home at lunchtime
Switch for 30 mins before dinner

DS8 doesn't like drawing any more and has never 'sat' with a toy/book for longer than 2 mins. He struggles to self-start play and it takes 20 mins of me telling him I'm busy, go and play. He loves to play in the garden but wants someone out with him at all times. He's very sociable which is great.

Screens are easier than toys of course. Would you cut back?

I'm sure some people will tell you it's too much but it seems fine to me (especially on rainy days).
We dont actually have screen limits because that always seemed too rigid to me. Every day is different! However we always make sure they have plenty of fresh air and exercise and do other things in the house. So far these holidays we've been doing a lot of travelling to see friends and family so they haven't had much time to go on screens.
I never set limits because if I'm honest it would make my life harder. There are times when I really need to get stuff done, the kids are bored and they've already had lots of exercise and just want to relax with their screens. I don't want to be in a position where I say "Sorry, you've already had your 30 minutes of tablet time". I don't see the harm in it uf they're doing plenty of other things. It's all about balance.

I agree but I tried no limits one weekend and he didn't put it down for 3 hours straight. He was really stroppy afterwards.

They have plenty of fresh air and exercise and outings as a family.

As you say, I'm trying to encourage the other things that can be done in the house (more free time where they amuse themselves with toys and books/audio books/music) as screens are being asked for all the time.

I think that is fine during the holidays.

As long as they are doing other stuff especially outdoor exercise it's fine.

I ban devices during the school week and they have them Friday after 5 pm and the weekend when we are home.

The summer holidays they cannot go on devices until at 3pm .. which is usually for an hour at 4pm if no extracurricular activities but if there are that day then can have it for an hour at 3pm.

I have a coin system implemented purely to get them to think themselves because I am always reminding them to do simple things like brush your teeth, wash your face. So if they do stuff without me asking them to they get a coin which equates to a minute of device time. If they read for 20 mins that's 20 coins. If they play football for half an hour that's 30 coins. They also get coins for chores lol.

Coins are removed for bad behaviour.

It's long-winded I know but it really motivates them to get everything done before they relax on devices and also helps with their counting and multiplying when grouping and counting.

It works for them and motivates them. Before the coin system used to be weekly and they would get a treat at the end of the week.

I agree with 3pm. I posted about having it later in the day on another thread.

I think it's harder for kids to motivate themselves to use their imagination with toys/crafts etc after the intense dopamine hit of a screen. Play is more work than having all the images spoon-fed to your eyeballs!

My 8 year old ds is allowed 1 hour of Minecraft per non-school day. No idea how long he’d play if it left to decide on his own. He usually chooses to take that the second he’s finished breakfast so it’s out of the way fairly early. Then they get their choice of tv after dinner, around 40 mins. One on the tv, one on the laptop. If it’s rainy or we’re all tired we might watch a movie together in the afternoon, but that’s a treat.

Sorry to slightly hijack your post OP but @ManicMum2023 i love the sound of your coin system! Please tell me more! How do you illustrate the coins, do you use physical pennies or anything? How old are your DC?

OP I feel your pain, my DS is 7 and he’s been pretty good at amusing himself with Lego or playing with his brother, but he’s not like this in term time, and he would still choose a screen over absolutely anything else. My DS age 4 isn’t great at playing on his own, has never been into toys such as Lego, cars etc, and he is constantly asking for tv.

@freespirit333
I use 10 p coins. I have a large glass jar (old coffee jar) and fill that with 10p coins and they each have a glass jar each so it's see through. The boys are 6 and 7 so safe for them to use glass jars and if they break it will be a lesson learnt.

The rules are on a colour card and there is a list of naughty actions where coins are removed.

They are motivated to follow it and don't moan that they don't get devices until after 3pm.

It has even motivated them to do their reading because they know they get 20 coins easily with that. If they do extra work like maths books or writing or spellings, they get a coin for each minute they did it. Sometimes they do 30 minutes of maths every other day and spellings the other day.

They easily accumulate 120 coins so at least I am teaching them to do their work first and sports/exercise and sometimes chores then they can relax after.

I say they get an hour a day but if they have 120 minut s of coins and have done reading, maths and some writing I am happy to give them 2 hours of device time.

This system works better than the weekly treats to the value of the coins they accumulated in the week.

Thanks all :)

No worries freespirit333. They'll be sociable lads for sure!

I said no to his request for TV just now (nearly bedtime) and he's just got some Lego people out and made a crowd :)

I think screens have their place and no family is the same. Even my two who are close in age are so different in play and temperament.