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Parenting

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Original poster

Feel lonely when dh works away

8 replies

thornberet · 14/08/2023 16:47

Hi everyone,

What the title says really. I solo parent 3 days/4 evenings a week while dh stays overnight in London to do his three days in the office. He leaves sunday afternoon and is back late Wednesday night. I work from home those three days and so have no camaraderie during the day. Just feel so alone shut in my bedroom all day and then have to tackle tea/bedtime routine on my own . I am so tired once she’s in bed that I do no housework and just zombie on my phone. Anyone have a similar set up? Any tips? I am also pregnant and so terrified about how i’ll cope with 2.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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scrabbledabbl · 14/08/2023 19:20

Sorry you feel this way. Do you have any friends or family close by that you could make plans with in the evenings? Or NCT
Group you can join?

Original poster

thornberet · 14/08/2023 20:54

Problem is I would have to get childcare to do things in the evenings, and other mum friends have the same problem so I can’t have them come over. I do playgroups and things on Thursdays and Fridays when dh is back.

OP posts:

SlicedPickles · 14/08/2023 20:57

Me too!

I struggle with it sometimes. One thing I find really helps me is using my lunch hour to run/go to the gym/walk.

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scrabbledabbl · 15/08/2023 12:49

Could you ask friends to come over in the evenings? Or just one evening get childcare?

Cloudsandrainnotsunandsand · 15/08/2023 12:50

Omg you people are living the dream imo!!

Whataretheodds · 15/08/2023 12:51

Do you get out at lunchtime?

Original poster

thornberet · 15/08/2023 16:17

Probably part of the problem is that I don’t really get a lunchbreak. Like many part time and from home workers I feel under pressure to hit targets that would probably be more suitable for a full time worker - i also spend quite a lot of time zombieing while at work. The moment I hand over dc its like my brain needs to shut down/decompress and I struggle to get into productive work mode.

@Cloudsandrainnotsunandsand there are certainly a lot of benefits to this set up. We really like living in the country generally. Just with the winter creeping up I do struggle sometimes. I don’t have a tonne of friends in the area as only moved two years ago so most friends are kind of ‘mum friends’ met through toddler groups.

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PuttingDownRoots · 15/08/2023 16:22

Can DH change his office days or you change his working days so you can be out and about when he's away?

Mine does similar (he's in the Army so he's either weeky commuting to his base or away elsewhere in the country/world) and having something to do out the house each day, even just food shopping, has kept me sane many times!

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