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Original poster

Toddler keeps saying she wants to go home when we are home

35 replies

Ek3009 · 09/08/2023 20:01

My daughter will be 3 in September.
For the last week she keeps saying she wants to go home even though we are home.

She says it quite a lot through the day and it just comes from nowhere. Tonight we were on the floor doing a jigsaw and she just looked at me and said ‘let’s go home’ then just went back to what she was doing.

Shes really advance with her speech for her age and you can talk to her like you would a teenager! If I ask her where she feels home is she just stares at me blankly and doesn’t answer. Also when she’s saying it she just seems quite zoned out.

We have a happy stable household and she is the happiest wee girl most of the time.

I know I’m being crazy but it’s making me feel quite sad. I just hate the feeling she doesn’t feel comfortable in her home or like she would rather be somewhere else.

Has anyone experienced anything similar? Did they grow out of it?

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lljkk · 09/08/2023 20:03

Toddlers say daft things.
Just smile & let her babble out or her system whatever she's feeling.

Just2MoreSeasons · 09/08/2023 20:13

Ahh i remember we had this for a while. She'd say it when she was tired and we were out somewhere where she'd had enough. Then started saying it home. I think she was just basically saying I don't want any stimulation now. It was generally a cue for an early night

whatthefreshhell · 09/08/2023 20:14

My son did this. It seemed to coincide with him being tired or wanting a cuddle. It stopped after a while

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CompaniesHouse · 09/08/2023 20:15

As above, it probably means something slightly less literal, like I’ve finished or I’ve had enough or this was fun. If you think about times she’s heard “let’s go home” you might be able to work out what she’s getting at.

Or she’s tired and just saying random things - mine would and it was just a toddler thing, she doesn’t do it anymore.

FunkyFangtooth · 09/08/2023 20:17

Yeh my 3 year old DS is similar to @Just2MoreSeasons - he started out saying it if we were out and he was either bored of what we were doing or tired. And now he will sometimes say it at home - again usually if he is a bit tired or fed up of what we're doing. I'm sure it's very easy given the speed at which they learn to talk to slightly misinterpret words sometimes!

Lavender14 · 09/08/2023 20:19

I'd take it to mean that she is tired or over overstimulated and wants your help to wind down a little, maybe just a nice cuddle or an early nap? I'd try to teach her some more words for tired or cuddles and see if she starts to use them instead.

Ozziedream · 09/08/2023 20:19

She’s trying to get you to finish what you’re doing! My sons both said this for a short spell.

TyneTeas · 09/08/2023 20:19

Yeah I think mine also thought it meant 'let's stop doing this' for a while, from the context of hearing it at the end of doing something and then going home

inloveonholiday · 09/08/2023 20:21

My little girl did this decades ago, it really upset me at that time for some reason. But I think other posters are right, she was tired and needed to sleep. Maybe it was her way of saying that. Maybe going home meant the feeling she could rest.

Bluekangaroo123 · 09/08/2023 20:22

My DD did this too at around the same age. Sometimes it was when she felt scared or insecure about something but sometimes there was no real trigger. She soon grew out of it & moved on to the next thing!

Ozziedream · 09/08/2023 20:22

In a similar vein (of toddlers not quite grasping what words mean) my DS described disgusting (to him) food as “tasty” because that’s what we said to him when trying new food: “ooh look it’s tasty”. He then associated the word “tasty” with “yucky”!

smartiesnskittles · 09/08/2023 20:24

You could try acknowledging it- "good idea, let's go home. You show me the way." Take her hand, smile and encourage her to lead. It may be pretend and end in a cuddle, at least you'll know a little more what's going on in her head.

AgathaMillersGoneMissing · 09/08/2023 20:24

My DS used to say this when he wanted me to stop doing something, like a PP. Because I used to say let's go home when we were out - he thought it meant let's finish what we're doing.

Comedycook · 09/08/2023 20:24

I imagine she has associated the phrase "let's go home" to mean she wants to finish whatever activity she is doing.

VivaVivaa · 09/08/2023 20:29

Yep, DS did this from about 2.5 and still occasionally does it now age 3.5. To agree with PPs, I think he said it when he was in some way discombobulated but couldn’t quite articulate why.

timberho · 09/08/2023 20:29

Agree - just looking for comfort and / or knowing what you're doing to be doing next. Be informative (we're at home) and reassuring (offer a cuddle and book.)

Original poster

Ek3009 · 09/08/2023 20:33

Thanks everyone.

I don’t know why it’s made me feel so sad! Think it’s just the way she says it and I have mum guilt this week as I have been working long hours so it maybe is she feels she needs a cuddle and reassurance as she’s not seen much of me this week.

I am off for the next 4 days so going to spend lots of 1 on 1 time with her and if she still mentions it I will definitely acknowledge it and try and dig deeper.

Would absolutely love to live in their wee heads for a day to see how they view the world.

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Hellocatshome · 09/08/2023 20:33

Have you actually said to her "we are at home" and see what she says next. Probably an easier way to approach it than asking where she feels home is which is an abstract concept even for some adults.

Original poster

Ek3009 · 09/08/2023 20:35

@Hellocatshome yeah I have said this to her as well. Sometimes I get ‘I know’ and other times just silence.

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TimeToMoveIt · 09/08/2023 20:38

None of mine have done this but I think pp may be correct that she's associating let's go home to I've had enough of what I'm doing now

Catlady38 · 09/08/2023 20:56

Okay, probably going to get slated for this and don’t even necessarily believe in it but my DD used to say this and around the same time I read a book called the forgetting time. It was a novel so not true but about reincarnation and apparently, if you believe in such things, it’s quite common until about the age of 7. Not saying you have to agree but just thought I’d mention it. My DD used to talk about her DM (not me!) and everything…

Hellocatshome · 09/08/2023 21:01

Catlady38 · 09/08/2023 20:56

I'm not sure if it's a reincarnation thing or maybe a development/finding their place in the world thing. My DS used to tell me about his other family. Such as "When I was in my other family I had a sister not a brother" or "The mum in my other family didn't wear glasses".

Wenfy · 09/08/2023 21:03

At this age sleep is as important as food and exercise. She’s probably drunk with fatigue and saying anything.

WallaceinAnderland · 09/08/2023 21:06

It sounds like she means 'I've had enough'. Agree with those who say she is just tired and needs to rest.

Original poster

Ek3009 · 09/08/2023 21:06

@Wenfy she sleeps 7-7 and has an hour nap every day. It’s not always when she’s tired. She could say within the first hour of getting out of bed so I don’t think it’s associated with her being tired or wanting to wind down.

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