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Original poster

Dog sleeping on bed - is it a pain after having a baby?

19 replies

charleypops · 14/12/2004 14:21

Hi,

Our lab, Charley has always slept on the bed with us. A few people I've mentioned this to say I should should try and get him used to sleeping elsewhere before the baby arrives in June. I'm guessing we will have the baby in the same room as us for the first few weeks.

I've really thought about this and can't actually figure out why I would need to banish Charley from the bed. I think if baby kept crying in the bedroom, then he'd slope off somewhere else anyway.

I need to start thinking about this now I suppose so I'm wondering if anyone here can offer any practical advise - anyone continued letting dog sleep on bed and regretted it?

Thanks!

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SpringCrimboTurkey · 14/12/2004 14:22

No advise apart from DD is still in with us and she is 5 months.
I think DB will be in with you for longer than a few weeks.

saintlysecur · 14/12/2004 14:34

agree that you may have db in with you for more than a few weeks!

I would have to take a view on how much bed I would have left-if db ends up int he bed with you as well, how much space do you think you will have left for yourself?!

If you are going to be in the bed too, I don't really see a reason for deardog to be chucked out-I agree he may choose to leave anyway! I would however be sure not to leave db alone with deardog-I know what it feels like when my dog sits on me-and it is not always intentional, I would be worried that deardog may jump up and accidently land ondb if I wasn't on the bed too.

WigWamBam · 15/12/2004 10:09

I think it depends very much on whether you intend to have your baby in with you from the start or not. We had the same concern about our cat, but for a number of reasons made the decision (which a lot of people thought was harsh) to keep dd in her own bedroom right from the start. I fed her in her own room, apart from the morning feed at about 6, when she came in with me and stayed sleeping in bed with me afterwards. I know a lot of people don't like the idea of a baby sleeping in its own room, but it worked for us and our dd - and it has meant that we've never had any sleep problems with her.

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nailpolish · 15/12/2004 10:11

my friend has a dog that sleeps on her bed. she made the decision not to have her baby sleeping in her room at all - the baby slept in his own room from day 1. she just bought a really good monitor, as she decided not to leave his bedroom door open either, cos of the dog. it all seemed to work out really well for them all and everyone was happy (esp the dog!)

emkana · 15/12/2004 10:15

When making the decision you should bear in mind though that the advice for the prevention on SIDS is to keep the baby in the bedroom with you until 6 months.

LAMBda · 15/12/2004 10:21

Our 2 cats were evicted from the bedroom when ds1 arrived - they were shut downstairs until he was in his own bed at 18 mths - now we have one cat who likes to sleep on any bed he can - ie ours, ds1, ds2 or the spare room

Original poster

charleypops · 15/12/2004 12:58

Gosh - I'd not really given much thought about where baby will sleep. I just assumed it'd be easier to have him next to me until I'd got used to having him around - probably out of laziness, not wanting to traipse through to another room every couple of hours. Dp I know hasn't thought about it at all - he's just a big grin on legs at the moment and hasn't got an inkling of any of the practicalities involved in between cuddling a cute gurgling tiny bundle and kicking a football around with him (or her).

StSecur - the dog jumping on the bed and accidently landing on the baby was something I hadn't thought about, but instinctively I wouldn't leave him in the big bed on his own with Charley anyway. As for room in there, I do sometimes wake up to find myself freezing and contorted into very strange postions around him after he's sneakily edged into my space and nicked the duvet! He always looks so sweet I don't have the heart to shift him! This could well change however as I get bigger....

From what everyones' kindly posted here so far, I think we'll be fine and things will work out. Thanks!

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pixiefish · 15/12/2004 13:03

try to sort the dog out now. your feelings will change once youv'e had the baby and you'll start worrying about germs etc. dog hair will also get on your nerves

TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 15/12/2004 13:05

dog could also be put out by being turfed out the room .. and see baby as an interloper who's invading his territory

also lots of babies do well with being in bed with mum and dad .. its comforting ang great for bonding

personally I'd get a dog a bed and make it sleep downstairs ..

Joolstide · 15/12/2004 13:08

Mmmm - I know lots of people do it but don't really agree with pets on beds but in any case would do what Twiglett suggests - get the dog his own bed and let him sleep downstairs.

I'm sure he's a lovely dog - labs are so gentle.

whitepixmas · 16/12/2004 15:18

I think you might change your mind about the dog on the bed before the birth anyway. When you are huge it's hard enough just turning over/getting up 10 times for the loo etc without having to share your space with a large lab!

NotQuiteCockney · 16/12/2004 18:22

Looks like I'm on my own with this. I co-sleep with DS2, and also with two cats. I leave DS2 in our bed with the cats. They went through a phase of sleeping next to his head, but that seemed to help him sleep, so I wasn't bothered.

I'm probably just lazy. DS1 periodically licks or kisses the cats, then asks me to get the fur off his tongue.

morningpaper · 16/12/2004 18:30

After two nights of sleep deprivation with my newborn, my beloved cat who I loved more than anything for the last 10 years was firmly locked downstairs and frankly at that stage she could have run off and I wouldn't have given a toss. It is HARD to find room in a bed with a newborn, and it is HARD to have your sleep disrupted two million times a night - if a dog/cat takes up room on a bed/snores or meiows and DARES to wake you, you'll be happy to beat it to death with a bedpost in a flash.

I agree with those who advise to get the dog used to sleeping somewhere else now.

Joolstide · 17/12/2004 13:21

sleepdeprived · 17/12/2004 13:26

Agree with all who say get him used to sleeping elsewhere NOW, in advance of baby's arrival. I never intended to do any co-sleeping but a lot of the time there is just no other option - you WILL find the baby ends up in your bed a lot in the early days. You will at least need that option - and you really don't want a dog who feels displaced by the new arrival.

saintlysecur · 17/12/2004 13:27

my cats sleep on the bed with dd3-that does not worry me, what does is the idea of a Lab jumping up on top of a baby-I wouldn't have any other problems though (apart forom space!)

mishiclaus · 17/12/2004 13:39

hi
our dog sleeps on our bed and did all the way through my pg and when ds arrived...i didnt have any problems and like your dog ours slopes off when ds was too loud for her....
Ds was in our room for 8 weeks then in his cot but his bedroom is next to ours and i could hear every movement...lol...it never posed a problem to us and only u can judge ur dogs personality..the only thing we did do was put a gate on ds room so the dog couldnt go in mainly due to hairs etc as babies can easily be irritated by them
take care and good luck

NotQuiteCockney · 17/12/2004 14:39

The image of a big dog jumping up onto a bed and landing on a baby is a scary one. And of course if the dog couldn't tell the baby was there, or if the baby was close to the edge, I guess this would be possible.

But I think (most?) dogs are better with babies than you'd think - my neighbour has two badly-trained large terriers. They jump up on me every time I go in his yard (I used to go running with them), except if I'm holding a baby - they won't jump then! This isn't a matter of training, these dogs aren't used to babies at all and aren't trained anyway.

Obviously, though, if you're not comfortable with the baby and dog in bed at the same time, you have to follow your instincts.

Original poster

charleypops · 17/12/2004 16:33

he he NQC - your DS1 sounds like he thinks he's a cat

Well, a lot of different points of view here. I'm very grateful. He is a big dog and I do forsee a bit of a clash of personalities between us when I get heavy re bed space!

What I've decided to do is look for a nice big cosy dog bed that can go next to the bed on dp's side and closer to the time put baby's cot next to me. The idea being that by the time I get uncomfortable he'll be settled in his new bed - dp can keep him off ours (hopefully won't have to persuade him with a bed post! ) I'm sure he'll soon get used to it, he tends to pick things up pretty quickly.

Due date is mid June and it's just occured to me that Charley prefers to sleep on a sofa downstairs in the summer months anyway because he gets too hot with us! So hopefully it will work out naturally for him (and us!)

Thank you all very much - it's another worry ticked off my list!!

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