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Original poster

Why won't my baby go to MIL?

7 replies

postingwithlove · 05/08/2023 16:38

My baby is 11 months. She is an extremely happy and sociable baby that will happily go to and be left with all my friends and family.

Except my MIL. It is BIZARRE. She just will NOT entertain her. Cries as soon as she comes near to her and if I attempt to leave her alone with her, will SCREAM (deep belly screams that I honestly never otherwise hear from her)

My MIL is a lovely lady who is kind and we can't think of any reason why my little one is so adverse to her. It's sad for my MIL who loves her so much and tries so hard.

Has anyone had this or similar with their babies?

Any advice?

I don't feel comfortable enforcing my baby into being held when she is so clearly upset but also I want them to have a relationship as I know it's making my MIL sad....

TIA x

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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imnotwhoyouthinkiam · 05/08/2023 16:53

My niece was like this with me until she was about 4.5. No idea why but if I so much as looked at her she'd cry!

She absolutely adores me now and phones me all the fucking time quite often to tell me she loves me.

Rocknrollstar · 05/08/2023 17:09

DD wouldn’t go to my father. We think he held her too tight. When she was about 15 months old he bought her a wheelbarrow and they became firm friends forever more.

Sugargliderwombat · 05/08/2023 21:43

Mine wouldn't go because my OH was so keen for him to like my MIL as much as my mum that he used to just thrust him into her arms without us even being there a second. It was just too quick and she was the only person to pick him up before even greeting me.

Is your MIL being too keen?

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Tired6789 · 05/08/2023 22:03

I think they can sometimes be like this, my little one is with some people. What we do is have them in the room but make sure the adult doesn't look at them until the baby is used to them.being in room. This might be a while and it works better if you're holding the baby too so she feels really secure. When used to her being in room then can look at baby and build up to chatting etc. I would do this for a number of visits before mil tries to hold again. I also think seeing her regularly helps. Don't overdo it on each visit, build up over time. Good luck

huggiess · 05/08/2023 22:08

Tired6789 · 05/08/2023 22:03

I think they can sometimes be like this, my little one is with some people. What we do is have them in the room but make sure the adult doesn't look at them until the baby is used to them.being in room. This might be a while and it works better if you're holding the baby too so she feels really secure. When used to her being in room then can look at baby and build up to chatting etc. I would do this for a number of visits before mil tries to hold again. I also think seeing her regularly helps. Don't overdo it on each visit, build up over time. Good luck

Don't make eye contact 😆 love it

PolkadotsAndMoonbeams · 05/08/2023 22:13

Does she wear glasses? Or you both do and she doesn't?

Junebuggirl · 13/08/2023 09:28

Yes my DC was like that with my brother, no idea why but luckily he grew out of it. It could be something as simple as her perfume or a bad experience she associates with MIL

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