Today I "lost" my child for the first time

[amispeakingintongues]

Transpired that he was hiding between a book shelf in the small library we were in.

I went into a frantic full blown screaming panic attack and believed he'd ran out into the road and went running across the streets screaming his name. I'm honestly traumatised. Every time I think about it I feel sick. He's only 2. And I'm pregnant.

I am still reeling from the experience so please make me feel like i'm not such an awful mother for this happening?

eldest age 2 escaped from me in a usa massive store, was hiding in bridal gown racks, i was both pregnant and had another child in a stroller. staff refused to leave their work stations, he was constantly 10 ft ahead of me, i went up the escalator (with the buggy) only to see him come down, down only to see him at the elevator.
in the end i sat down and cried and said to myself if it's meant to be for him to return he will. he eventually did find me

this is hands down one of the oddest things I’ve ever read. So many questions…..

Every single one of my friends in our Mum group has a story to tell of disappearing toddlers/preschoolers in parks, stores, forests, playgrounds.

Mine was in a massive European supermarket. So the added fun of not being able to explain properly to staff in a language I didn't know well. He was found chatting away to a nice lady in a deli queue.

I lost my 2 sons on Carbis Bay beach in Cornwall about 18 years ago . They were found practicing their rugby throws with the England Rugby Team on the beach !

We lost my nephew in a shopping centre when he was about 18 months. My sister thought he was with me and vice versa. We found him in the toy department playing in a playhouse as happy as anything!
Same nephew a year later wandered off at a restaurant in a hotel. Found him in a wedding reception dancing with a bridesmaid!

Sounds like he could be my son!!
And SPD is horrible must have made the whole thing so much worse

Oh my gosh the bridesmaid story!! I wouldn't know whether to laugh or cry. Probably both

Yeah I think being abroad without knowing the language has got to be one of the worst ways

😭😭😭 the "mummy" got me

You're not an awful or bad mum. We have all been there and it's the most horrible feeling. But children like to push boundaries and all you can do is gently but firmly tell him that it made you scared and it was dangerous and he could have got lost. Keep it simple but firm.

This reminds me of when we lost my daughter on a beach in Brittany when she was 2 years old. We were camping on a site right next to the beach and had just walked from our tent to eat lunch. We were with some new friends we’d met on the campsite with had two older children who enjoyed making a fuss of my three. We were just sorting ourselves out when I noticed that my daughter was not with the other children but her clothes were in a pile on the sand so we went into full panic mode running to the sea.

My husband dived into the sea, I ran carrying my baby to the life guards while the other family began searching the beach and sand dunes. After about 5 minutes, the father told his daughters to go back to their tent to fetch some binoculars. This was pre mobile phones. The lifeguards were about to launch a boat when one of the daughters came running back shouting that they had found her sitting on a sun lounger outside our tent! Apparently my daughter had needed a poo so just took herself off to the campsite toilets, could not find them but did find our tent. She then did a poo in the potty I had in the awning and I don’t think she knew what to do so just sat there.

I guess she was lost for less than 10 minutes but had she got in the sea and out of her depth, then we might have lost her. I think the whole beach clapped when she finally trotted back with the other girl, shouting “ I done a poo Mum in the tent!”

Twenty odd years ago I lost my eldest at a children's theme park. There was a large role playing area with different small buildings as shops etc. she must have wandered out. She was nowhere to be seen. I grabbed an employee who was useless. Apparently there was no walkee talkees, no policy or procedure. So my friends and I just split up and searched. A friend found her, it had been about 20 minutes though. Absolutely terrifying

Nightmare!

I don't know if I got it right but based on watching American films, I've drummed it into my kids that if I shout Marco, they shout Polo. By the time the eldest was about three it was really useful to have a locating him word.

I also use a wrist strap on a coiled wire when out. It wouldn't stop them stepping into the road or getting into trouble, but they can't dash off.

I must have been the most terrible mother in the world as my DD1 was "lost" so many times when she was little.

Ages 2-5 DD1 (middle child Ds 19m older and dd2 2.5 y younger) would run off constantly. I had to literally strap her down to prevent it and she would wriggle out of straps like a teeny Houdini. We now understand better what was going on as DD has been diagnosed with autism and ADHD. But basically she would wander off, run off without a backward glance, go look for strangers to talk to and it was constant.

Every time we went to soft play at some point there would be an announcement over the tannoy because she had hidden herself somewhere. I lost her at a friend's wedding, she had gone to the loo without telling me and not responded when I was calling for her. On beach holidays she would wander off down to the sea or to look for other families to talk to. Waiting to pick her brother up from school she would run into classrooms or out of the gate. Her every impulse was acted on and each time she was told not to run off or speak to strangers out of sight of her parents etc. she would get distressed but not learn not to do it again. It was exhausting.

It probably sounds like I was incredibly lax, but with 3 children between 0 and 4 once the youngest was born. I was constantly juggling the children. Keeping a determined tiny girl from running off would take all my attention. So I focused on keeping them all alive, which I managed. Even when DH was with me we would lose dd1.

So I know that yawning pit of despair that opens when your child is missing even briefly. Now DD is 17 and we are very happy that despite her best efforts we kept her safe. She is and was delightful.

DH lost DS aged 2 in NEXT when I was in another shop. I met him in the doorway for him to announce 'he's gone'. I will never ever forget that feeling.
We found him amongst the clothes rails.

I lost DD, then about 2, in my garden. We had a little square house, with garden all the way around, and a long drive with a bend on it that went down to the road, then that road almost immediately went to a very very busy main road, no pavement, 60mph.

We were in the back garden, and DD toddled round the corner of the house, so I walked round the corner and she had already gone round the next corner. I started to run, and went all the way round the house calling her name until I got back to the front of the house, so 1.5 loops. Still no sign. By now I'm screaming for her, and I don't know whether to go down the drive in case she's gone down to the road or back to the garden because the paddling pool is there, I'm just standing at the top of the drive screaming her name as loud as I can in utter despair and suddenly she appears from the corner of the house, giggling away, holding a flower. I must just have been following her in a circle, but I was at a dead run and had no idea she could go that fast!