6 month old screaming if I'm not there

[MrsLeopard]

My son is 6 months old, I am currently on maternity leave. I am planning on going back to work 3 days a week from November.

I went to a funeral this morning and left my son with my husband for 3 hours. My husband said that our son fidgeted for the first half hour and then screamed until I came home. He tried feeding him, walking with him, cuddling him, playing with him, putting TV on and going out in the pram but nothing helped. My son has been like this before when left for an hour with my mum.

He goes bright red and is inconsolable until I return, how do I stop this? My son needs to start nursery in 3 months, I can't afford not to work but with how he is just now nothing will soothe him.

Today was the first time my husband had looked after our son on his own for more than half an hour and has said I can't leave him with baby again until things improve. What can I do? Feeling desperate now

You'll have to leave him with your husband or with others more frequently so he gets used to you going but always returning. 3 months is a long time in the life of a baby though so it may be different in November!

3 months is a long time.

During that time, you need to GRADUALLY get baby used to be looking after by others. Don't push it (unless you get close and have no choice). If baby is happy for half an hour, do lots of half hours - every day if possible, with DH and anyone else that can help out - any grandparents that can pop in for some short stints? After ~10 successful half hours, start upping length of time in 15 min increments or so (increments can get larger over time if it's going well). If baby believes you are the ONLY person that can meet their physical/emotional needs they won't want you to go!

Leaving him with my husband isn't an option, he's made it very clear that he can't cope with the baby alone and until my son learns to be without me he will refuse to be left alone with him.

Sorry but that’s not an acceptable response from your husband. It will be hard but you need to leave baby with husband more, and over time it will get better. He’s just as much a parent as you are.

Your husband needs to suck it up I'm afraid, how will your baby improve with no practice/gentle build up? Your husband also needs to work on his baby comforting skills... Unless the baby is breastfeeding then there's nothing you can do that he can't

My baby was like this almost until 11 months old. my husband would take her between 3am- 9am to allow me to sleep and again he would put her to bed and the entire time she screamed.

its the fourth trimester.

we just got on with it, the other alternative would’ve been absolutely zero. Rest for me. As she got older she started realising her daddy was taking care of her.

I’m afraid it’ll just get harder if daddy is not in the picture too,

And how does he propose your son learning to be without you......without your son regularly being without you?!

Sorry but your husband needs to step up and build a better bond with the baby. How else will be learn how to comfort him and calm the baby in his own way, if you're there to take over all the time? Refusing to have him on his own will only make things worse. Because then he'll still never experience being without you?!! So will be even worse in 3 months!
You need to actually leave the house too as otherwise you'll just be expected to "save" him when baby gets upset. Start with half an hour regularly, and build up. Don't step back in as soon as baby cries. Hubby needs to learn to settle him.