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Original poster

Where does the third kid go?

131 replies

Dreamingofthree · 03/08/2023 21:36

I have 2 and I’d love another but here’s the issue, space.

on the surface of the matter would seem fine as we have a 4 bed house but we need one of the rooms as an office as our jobs are predominantly wfh.

bedrooms are 2 doubles and 2 singles atm the kids have the singles, we have one double and the other is an office/ spare. But say we had 3 what would we do then? I’d look to get pregnant this time next year and mortgages as are they are moving and upsizing isn’t viable right now, neither is additional borrowing for an extension, maybe a conservatory that we could use as an office but still not until rates calm down.

current dcs are girl then boy. We’d keep baby in with us until about 9 months and then we find they sleep better in their own space.

would you put the boy and girl together for a time in the double room and then have the baby alone til they sleep better and then move them in with a sibling of the same sex til we can get a conservatory built? Seems a lot of moving about for a child, and would a girl who’s 7 want to share with a 2 year old (if the baby was a girl)

anyone done a summer house office?

i know it’s a bit cart before the horse but I like to think things through

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Original poster
Dreamingofthree · 04/08/2023 17:28

BiscuitsandPuffin · 03/08/2023 23:35

Assuming you don't get twins, you will have three, which means you will have two of one sex and one of the other (anything else is physically impossible at this point).

After the first 6-12 months (of cot in your room) I'd put the 2 of the same sex in the big room, the third child in the small room, move the office to the second small room and keep the second big room for mum and dad. I think sharing is nice for littler kids as it stops them being scared of the dark.

When the kids got older and were ready to have their own rooms each, then is time to look at a summer house/garden office. Not sure why security would be an issue; you take your laptop back in the house at the end of the day, surely??

The other thing I'd think about is using your second living room (assuming you have a proper 4 bed with the downstairs floor space to match the upstairs space for 4 beds/2 baths).

There's a family with 11 kids who manage in a 4 bedroom house. They're often spotted with the Radford family.

We just have one living room and one kitchen, one wc and 2 cupboards and a hall downstairs, then upstairs is master bed with ensuite, main bathroom (quite small actually) 2x single rooms and 1 other double and obviously the hall

OP posts:
Minimooncat · 04/08/2023 22:15

We have a 3 bed and 2 kids. Both wfh full time. Husband in garden office small garden but works OK and I'm in the lounge in a corner.

Isthisasgoodasitis · 04/08/2023 23:26

This mine has a bedroom and a playroom which was never used in the old house so in this one the open plan left us lounge/playroom kitchen and the dining room in what would have been the bedroom so we have a loo in there which visitors find highly amusing 🤦‍♀️

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Bexblue · 05/08/2023 03:12

Oh no however will you cope .you can't possibly give up the indulgent office for a child poor kids

autienotnaughti · 05/08/2023 04:58

The two older children share the second double bedroom. Third dc gets a single bedroom, office moves into other single bedroom.

PurBal · 05/08/2023 05:39

Off topic: you have an XC90 and a 4 bed house for 2 children? What the heck do you need an XC90 for? Those things are properly huge. Feeling very inferior with my 3 bed semi and Ford Focus for our family of 4. Obviously you can buy whatever car you like but I think maybe you’re trying to find a solution to a problem you don’t have. Children can share, not just in the short term but in the longer term too. I shared with my two brothers until I was 7. Bunk beds and a single in a double room. DH and I also WFH and one room is a dedicated office, it has to be so we can work effectively. The plan is our (same sex) children will share until at least secondary school. We’re unlikely to move up the ladder because we love our house but will look into a garden office.

Vole3 · 05/08/2023 06:13

my friends tried for their third child and ended up with twins……..
just saying it’s a possibility

MillicentTrilbyHiggins · 05/08/2023 07:19

PurBal · 05/08/2023 05:39

Off topic: you have an XC90 and a 4 bed house for 2 children? What the heck do you need an XC90 for? Those things are properly huge. Feeling very inferior with my 3 bed semi and Ford Focus for our family of 4. Obviously you can buy whatever car you like but I think maybe you’re trying to find a solution to a problem you don’t have. Children can share, not just in the short term but in the longer term too. I shared with my two brothers until I was 7. Bunk beds and a single in a double room. DH and I also WFH and one room is a dedicated office, it has to be so we can work effectively. The plan is our (same sex) children will share until at least secondary school. We’re unlikely to move up the ladder because we love our house but will look into a garden office.

If it makes you feel less inferior I'm in a 2 bed terrace with no car. Family of 3 (2 teens and me)

Hurrayforfridays · 05/08/2023 07:20

Not about the bedroom space but I would be cautious about using a conservatory as an office... We had one and it was awful - got full sun till mid afternoon and was unbearably hot in summer, freezing in winter and the glare made it hard to see screens. Obviously depends which way it's facing though!

Nix32 · 05/08/2023 07:25

Have you got a garage you could convert?

Twyford · 05/08/2023 07:35

What are the options for going into the loft space?

justasking111 · 05/08/2023 07:43

Friends had the hall divided with a wall and a door put in. Works very well. With Three children I wouldn't want to be in the garden out of earshot with mine. We have a conservatory with a proper roof and blinds.

I'd get an architect in to advise if I were @Dreamingofthree

MariaVT65 · 05/08/2023 07:47

Hi OP

We live in a 3 bed house and are expecting our second child. We both wfh and my DH currently works in the spare bedroom. We fully accept that we will have to work in the kitchen. Not ideal, but the kids come first. If needed, we will have to look into building a garden office.

Original poster
Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:13

Bexblue · 05/08/2023 03:12

Oh no however will you cope .you can't possibly give up the indulgent office for a child poor kids

How is an office indulgent? It’s written into our contracts that we have a clear and defined work space free from distraction (aka kids)

OP posts:
Original poster
Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:17

PurBal · 05/08/2023 05:39

Off topic: you have an XC90 and a 4 bed house for 2 children? What the heck do you need an XC90 for? Those things are properly huge. Feeling very inferior with my 3 bed semi and Ford Focus for our family of 4. Obviously you can buy whatever car you like but I think maybe you’re trying to find a solution to a problem you don’t have. Children can share, not just in the short term but in the longer term too. I shared with my two brothers until I was 7. Bunk beds and a single in a double room. DH and I also WFH and one room is a dedicated office, it has to be so we can work effectively. The plan is our (same sex) children will share until at least secondary school. We’re unlikely to move up the ladder because we love our house but will look into a garden office.

Don’t feel inferior it’s just stuff at the end of the day.

we bought our house pre kids, it’s not a massive 4 bed (actually quite the opposite)

we got an xc90 because it’s has a full middle and then still boot space. We drive to France on hols a fair amount and bring my mother so we really need it tbh

OP posts:
Original poster
Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:18

Twyford · 05/08/2023 07:35

What are the options for going into the loft space?

It’s a very small loft and atm you can’t put anything up there. That sounds additional borrowing expensive to me not sure that is would be viable, thank you for the suggestion though :)

OP posts:
Original poster
Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:20

justasking111 · 05/08/2023 07:43

Friends had the hall divided with a wall and a door put in. Works very well. With Three children I wouldn't want to be in the garden out of earshot with mine. We have a conservatory with a proper roof and blinds.

I'd get an architect in to advise if I were @Dreamingofthree

I’m not sure I could do that division with the hall, would probably make sense to move if it came to that.

did you find your conservatory got hot in the summer and cold in winter?

OP posts:
WannaBeRecluse · 05/08/2023 09:20

We either moved or built on. We had an attached outdoor room which we were able to connect to the house and have turned into a bedroom. I don't know if any of those is a longer term consideration for you.

Original poster
Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:30

WannaBeRecluse · 05/08/2023 09:20

We either moved or built on. We had an attached outdoor room which we were able to connect to the house and have turned into a bedroom. I don't know if any of those is a longer term consideration for you.

Longer term I think we’d move we realistically don’t have much land to build on being a new build

OP posts:
WannaBeRecluse · 05/08/2023 09:43

Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:30

Longer term I think we’d move we realistically don’t have much land to build on being a new build

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Another suggestion - one of those outdoor rooms you can drop on the section as an office. They don't have to be big at all. Then you have an extra bedroom free already.

Original poster
Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:46

WannaBeRecluse · 05/08/2023 09:43

Another suggestion - one of those outdoor rooms you can drop on the section as an office. They don't have to be big at all. Then you have an extra bedroom free already.

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Tell me more? Like a garden pod or an extension?

OP posts:
WannaBeRecluse · 05/08/2023 09:51

Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:46

Tell me more? Like a garden pod or an extension?

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Something like a pod. Or https://www.projecttimber.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/10x8_My_Den_Single_Door-1.png They can just drop them in.

https://www.projecttimber.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/10x8_My_Den_Single_Door-1.png

Original poster
Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:54

WannaBeRecluse · 05/08/2023 09:51

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See I’ve always thought of them at the end of the garden (you can tell iM not architect) but are you saying they can dropped in next to your house? I’m guessing it wouldn’t connect as such like an extension would?

OP posts:
WannaBeRecluse · 05/08/2023 09:56

Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:54

See I’ve always thought of them at the end of the garden (you can tell iM not architect) but are you saying they can dropped in next to your house? I’m guessing it wouldn’t connect as such like an extension would?

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I think they can put them wherever you want (but you'd have to check local regulations about all that sort of thing). I don't see why you couldn't hook it up to the house, but it's not something I've done. Someone who provides them could probably give you better info.

justasking111 · 05/08/2023 10:44

Dreamingofthree · 05/08/2023 09:20

I’m not sure I could do that division with the hall, would probably make sense to move if it came to that.

did you find your conservatory got hot in the summer and cold in winter?

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No it has an insulated roof, lots of windows with top openings, part bricked, double doors out onto decking, blinds, underfloor heating and two electric fan wall heaters if you need heat fast.

It's a lovely airy space to dine in, work in, or do arts and crafts with the children.

The cost of stamp duty, estate agent, solicitors, removals are extortionate now when you do the math.