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I need help, no patience, feeling guilty and dd is feeling the brunt 8-(

7 replies

ROSEgarden · 26/02/2008 20:04

im a cm so all my days are spent looking after, nursing, cuddling, playing, feeding, settling and taking care of other peoples children.
I love my job, it means i am able to take and collect my own dd from school.

But just lately(dont know if its down to starting back at school this week) my dd is like a teenager with me, i collect her from school and open my arms for a hug and she meets me with a frown..we get home and she argues with the other children, she is snappy and sarcastic( a trait i guess she got from us) ie: "I said i would like x not y"..in a tone..so still being polite, but with attitude.
i know its not her fault, but as soon as i finish work i dont get to chill for 5 minutes, im putting dinner on for us all, filling drinks up, stacking dishwasher, putting washing in/out, running baths, getting dd changed for bed..yes i know everything we all do, but i dont get space between finisheing work and doing house stuff for 2 minutes to collect my thoughts and get myself sorted.
As soon as the last mindee steps foot out of our house, dd is "Bored", "no one to play with", "what can i do now" etc etc..so im doing house stuff whilst feeling knackerd and feeling guilty that dd no longer has "anyone to play with", so then she gets snappy, i get snappy, she then wont eat, so i get more snappy, dp comes in and sudenly he's the best thing since sliced bread, the kiss and cuddle i neevr got from school is given in abundance to dp, chats about her day(after she "cant remember" what shes done when i ask)
at chilling out time (for dd) before bed we sit and read, watch a dvd etc..but dd bounces of the walls, cahttering running round near the firs so gets told to sit down so many times my head hurts..she still doesnt..then she goes to bed and the same thing happens every night as its done for many monhts now, i feel guilty, wonder what i could have done different and sit on here all night getting nothing done and feeling worse..
sorry looks like a pityful moan really, just having a really rubbish time

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
seb1 · 26/02/2008 20:16

What age is your DD? Mine is 7, (going on 14) at the moment and honestly I swear she is hormonal, always huffing and I now it is very draining to deal with.

RedJools · 26/02/2008 20:19

No real help for you, but sympathy aplenty!! Poor old mum always gets the worst of it!! Is she happy enough at school, with her friends etc?

ROSEgarden · 26/02/2008 20:19

She's 4!..i know they only feed of what we do, but am so drained with all this at moment, even giving her treats when she does good doesnt make it last

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ROSEgarden · 26/02/2008 20:21

yeah she loves school, she loves having the children here too as shes an only child and has adjusted really well(been cm'ing nearly 2 years)..i just seem to be rushing round and dont have time for her and when i do put everything else on the back burner for her, shes a little madam..and crys at tiny things lately which makes me feel worse(i told her not to scrape her toy hoover along the newly apinted walls tonight..she stopped, then she went on to do it again..i just looked and she just stared straight back!..when i asked why she was being s cheeky she started to cry!??

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scattyspice · 26/02/2008 20:23

I think lots of kids are like that with their mums. Mum's work goes unoticed. Dads get lots of attention (and often get to do the fun activities).

When I feel put upon I remind myself how much they'd miss me if I wasn't there (contemplate the possibility of absconding for a few days).
I also try to make time to do what I want each day.
Also its good to set aside some time to do something fun with your child that you might enjoy too (I love to take DS to cinema)and sod the houswork occasionally.

ROSEgarden · 26/02/2008 20:25

i know what you mean, tonight dp was moaning, dd was wired and i just felt like walking out, going upstairs and going to bed and let them sort themselves out..i doubt dp knows i feel like this, im always wearing my"im fine" face..but im really close to breaking at the moment and i feel so stupid as its not like its a huge major problem, just me being oversensitive and sackless!

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scattyspice · 26/02/2008 20:27

Definately try and find time to do something you enjoy, interests you now and then. Good luck.

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