Does this sound like a night terror?

[Miriam101]

DS, just turned 3, woke up shouting and crying last night at about midnight. Seemed really distressed - kicking, writhing etc- but couldn’t articulate what was wrong. Eyes shut and then sometimes open. Semi-lucid after a while- most just shouting but articulate enough to tell me to go and his dad to stay! After about 10 mins or so he completely stopped and went back to sleep. And this morning he didn’t seem to remember anything about it (although obviously he’s young so who knows). Does this sound like a night terror? He’s had bad dreams occasionally before but this felt different- normally a quick rub of his back and a little cuddle and he’ll be ok. But it felt like he was unreachable (because he was asleep all along?!) If it was a night terror, what’s the best way of dealing with it? Our interventions if anything seemed to make him more aggravated.

Yes that sounds like night terrors. My son used to have them. We found if we went in to him as soon as we heard him starting to stir we could stop it in its tracks just be sitting with him and rubbing his back. If he was in full swing we would just stay with him to make sure he didn’t hurt himself, he would sometimes get out of bed. We found his were worse when he was unwell so we were more alert to them then.

Agree. Terrors in DS we’re worse if he had a temperature. He grew out of them, but I once asked discreetly if he could have the lower bunk on a school trip because at times he got up and roamed around.

Yes, my son went through a phase of having them.
Waking them up just before they begin is the best thing.
What I also found worked for him was sitting him on the toilet. He would have a wee and wake up gently of his own accord and then go back to sleep.

My ds suffered terribly with night terrors around this age. It is quite a scary thing to witness, as they are usually really terrified of something.

My ds would 'see' things. Always had his eyes opened, and at first I thought he was awake. Then he would look over at the corner (or wherever he saw the thing) and the sheer terror and screams would start again. I would always try to just put him back into bed, as I didn't want him to wake up in another room and be disorientated about how he got there etc. I would always stay with him, and after a while he would settle, but remember nothing of it the next day.

As they were happening quite a frequently, I started to make a note of things that went on in the day of the night terror. Pinpointed a lot them them to certain tv programmes, one in particular. It went on for a few years and he did eventually grow out of it. He is in his 20s now, he has still has very vivid dreams though. It may not be linked at all in your dc case, but he was diagnosed with ADHD at age 7 and we were led to believe that it is more common in diagnosed children.

It is awful to see though OP. But just know he probably won't remember any of it. Personally, I would monitor what he is watching on tv.

Two of mine had/have these. Eldest and youngest - eldest now largely grown out of them at 15. Agree with pp that sitting on the toilet is good - was/is the only way to get through it for mine, otherwise they just go on and on and it's awful because they're utterly terrified and calling for me while I'm right there and they just can't see me.

Yes that sounds like a night terror. Ours lasted a few years, and were worse if Ill or over-tired. I used to gently move him back to lying in bed and say calmly, lie down etc. this seemed to make them tail off. I think you get used to it and manage to be calm rather than panicked which helps.

My nephew has adhd and he used to have bad night terrors as a child so must be some truth in that !

Yes it does
My 7 year old started with them around that age
She has about two in a row every couple of months
Always at about a midnight for 10-15 mins or so and always two nights in a row and then it goes again .
She never remembers anything

I would agree with the others it definitely sounds like terrors my DS is 2½ and this has happened a few times it's heartbreaking to watch! At first I just made it worse by trying to console him I learnt if I didn't touch him and didn't speak and let he ride it out obviously I was right there so he didn't hurt himself because he would really lash out. After he calmed down I would pass him his dummy he would go straight back asleep and wake up fresh as a daisy not bothered where I was left traumatized xx

Classic night terror. My DS had them same age. We'd hear a loud, panicked cry, go up and he'd be sitting or standing, seeming awake but wasn't really. He'd seem to interact with us a bit, but was actually in some sort of nightmare. Sometimes he'd look at us and see something else and cry 😢

I used to bring him downstairs so as not to disturb DD and would just try to hold him and stroke his hair. His favourite programme was Abney and Teal and that playing quietly would calm him.

Yes this sounds like a night terror. There’s nothing you can do, you have to just be patient and stay with them until they pass. My eldest (7) gets them when he needs a wee badly. It’s like his body is trying to wake him up to go to the loo but hasn’t managed it completely. If I can I guide him to the toilet and then he gets back in bed and falls back to sleep pretty much straight away

Thanks so much all for replying. By what age did your kids grow out of them? Interesting that a lot of you flag the link to needing to wee… He’s still in nappies at night so not sure how we would approach that.

Ds stopped having them regularly at 11, and stopped completely by 14. Dd is 9 and is still going through it

@BewareTheBeardedDragon 😱you poor thing, you must be knackered!!

yes absolutely this sounds like a night terror. Our DD had them from around 2-2.5 years. They lasted 6 ish months. She will extremely occasionally get one now but only if she is very exhausted. She was fighting naps and refusing to sleep until 10pm when they started. They are connected to rem sleep cycles. I read something recently where if you spot a pattern (ours always started 2-2.5 hours after she went to sleep) you can break them by breaking their sleep right before one is due with a pee break or a bottle. I wish I’d known that at the time. They do pass, but they’re horrible x

@Miriam101 it can be wearing when dd gets one several nights in a row, but then she'll go
For a few nights to a few weeks without so it's not constant.

Another yes from me. 9yo now, still happens but less often. Sleepwalking though...