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Parenting

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Mother in law nightmare

6 replies

Somuchtoask · 17/07/2023 11:36

Mil has been a nightmare since ds was born 14 months ago, she basically thought we were sharing custody of him with her in how much alone time she expected right from birth and when dp wouldn’t tell her no and left me to do it I became a massive issue to her. Fast forward to this last month or two and me and her had a major falling out, I wanted to state problems I had with stuff she had done but she just attacked me as a person. When I told her she won’t be getting ds up to babysit again due to concerns of her behaviour when alone with him (which has been passed on by her daughter and husband) she became real nasty telling me it’s her grandson and she’ll be getting him up whenever she wants. She then tried to get my mother on side and when she didn’t get the sympathy She wanted from her turned nasty on her as well. Her own family excuse her behaviour by saying she doesn’t realise what she’s doing but she is fully aware of her behaviour she has family manipulated through crocodile tears and huffs. I have no said I won’t be around her as shes quite a toxic person and have said dp can take ds up to see her once every two weeks. I know this has to happen but it annoys me so much inside when he takes ds up as I know in her head she thinks she’s winning as she doesn’t have to see me (the only person who ever put boundaries in place with her and ds, dp let’s her do what she wants) and she’s getting ds up to see her. I don’t really think I have a question just needed a rant and from anyone else in the same situation does it get any easier

OP posts:
Dillydollydingdong · 17/07/2023 11:43

She's off her trolley and you need to be careful. If ds takes your baby to see her, can you be sure she'll let him bring him back? It sounds as though she thinks she's the mother.

Somuchtoask · 17/07/2023 11:48

She definitely would give him back she’s all very much about image, she wants everyone to think shes lovely. When it was just me and her alone she was so sharp and to the point and nasty with me but as soon as dp and fil came in she was stammering and stuttering and playing with her hands and saying it was all made up lies. She’s just quite toxic then when people don’t play into her hands shes a different person, I just hate when ds goes to visit her as I know she’ll make remarks about me and my family but if I don’t let him visit her it’s gonna end up breaking up me and dp so I feel forced to allow it

OP posts:
moulsated · 17/07/2023 12:32

What was the concerning behaviour when alone with him?

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Somuchtoask · 17/07/2023 12:42

Yeah and it was sister and father in law who told me about it happening

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StripeyDeckchair · 13/01/2024 17:55

Leave it to your DH to organise cisiting his family with DC

I bet every 2 weeks doesn't happen for long, if at all.
TBH even if you get on well with your family visiting every 2 weeks is quite a commitment with everything else.

Nantescalling · 19/02/2024 23:01

Your current solution sounds ideal. You keep away from the evil witch and let hubby deal with it. She sounds like the worst MIL in the world so keep your world apart!

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