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Parenting

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Please help me leave my useless husband

6 replies

Helena1993 · 17/07/2023 10:40

I’ve posted many times before about my husband being completely useless. I can’t take it anymore. I just can’t. We just argued again. He didn’t set an alarm and forgot to drop our toddler off at childcare and I got mad because it’s not the first time. He’s absolutely useless in every way. The only thing he does is work and I’m surprised he is even able to keep his job with his attitude.
He only does a household task when I tell him 100 times and then he only does 1 or 2 little tasks and leaves everything to me (even when he’s at home for 1 or 2 months with no work. So I have to keep reminding him all day and then he tells me I’m annoying and just bitching.
Ive tried to tell him nicely, made a plan. He doesn’t even look at it.
All he does is make a mess and piss me off to no end. When I tell him I need more help he just ignores me and keeps playing games, sleeps or watches TV.
I hate him and I have no respect for him anymore.
The doctor has some concerns about his health because he is obese and he doesn’t care and keeps eating like a pig. Sweets, fatty foods and tells me I’m a shit cook for cooking healthy. Well I can’t give our baby the crap he eats.
I used to have pretty severe anxiety disorder and I recovered but it has come back. I have so much stress and anger in me that I constantly have health problems like headaches, tinnitus and stomach problems. My hands are shaking as I’m writing this.
I’ve given him many chances, talked to him a million times in the last years but he doesn’t change.

How can I divorce him and still make sure that I’m financially stable?

Please don’t tell me to stay. I can’t do this anymore.

If you’re a single mum please tell me what to expect

OP posts:
Dahlia5 · 17/07/2023 11:37

Make a plan and write down everything that needs sorting.
Make a budget to see how you'll cope financially.
Consult a good solicitor for advice and action plan on legal matters.
Do you have only one child? Do you have family or a friend to help you?

Fizzology · 17/07/2023 11:43

Are you earning at the moment OP? What is your housing situation?

The first step, anyway, is a solicitor. Find one and make an appointment.

If you go along to the appointment with solid knowledge of how much money you have and where it is (joint accout? His account? Yours? Etc), all the better.

INeedAnotherName · 17/07/2023 11:56

I hear you.

Get copies of all financial documents, his, yours, joint. Including pensions and investments.
Make an initial appointment with a solicitor to find out what you might be entitled to. You don't have to stay with that solicitor if you decide to divorce.

Only once you know your legal rights can you make a proper plan.

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Helena1993 · 17/07/2023 22:20

Thank you all! I’ll make an appointment with a solicitor

OP posts:
DrewHormordr · 02/03/2024 18:35

Go to a solicitor and start divorce proceedings. If he’s violent-get out while he’s at work. Go to a refuge or a relative👍DONT tell him you’re going to leave if he’s violent- just GO

CadyEastman · 02/03/2024 18:39

DrewHormordr · 02/03/2024 18:35

Go to a solicitor and start divorce proceedings. If he’s violent-get out while he’s at work. Go to a refuge or a relative👍DONT tell him you’re going to leave if he’s violent- just GO

I'm hoping that the OP already has as her post is 9 months old.

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