People asking if you're having another

[Tiredjoanna]

Just wanted to know others experience with this. I've got 1ds 9mo and only planned on ever having one. Now when we are out and people coo over him they all ask so are you having another? Now what got me was that this started when he was 2 days old, that's the first time I got asked. Has anyone had same and what you think 🤔

After multiple miscarriages and some health complications in my last pregnancy with DS, I'm not sure if I ever want to TTC and be pregnant again as the entire process has given me anxiety and PTSD (formally diagnosed).

Not everyone knows what I've been through and not many people IRL can relate to it. But I get so, so many questions now he's turning 2. It's like an automatic assumption I should be TTC now and have another one when he turns 3.

I hate it. I would like another child, buy not another pregnancy and I'm really struggling internally. Wish people minded their own bloody business and their own reproductive systems.

I bluntly say no DH is on the waiting list for a vasectomy. (True)
If they think I'm joking or keep pushing it , like bizarrely a woman at my regular gym class who I barely know. I then say I was told at 18 I'd never have a baby, and then lost half the blood in my body delivering this one and my own life was in jeopardy delivering a very premature poorly baby who then nearly died himself at 4 weeks, so no I won't be repeating that.
She looked shocked but didn't ask again.
People need to realise these things are personal.

I'm very fortunate to have never miscarried, my friend has a number of times over a decade, it has been hellish for her and her husband. She is now currently in active labour with her first and probably only child, if anyone asks her this question I'll be tempted to just punch them in the face.

Some people think this is small talk, personally I find it rude. I have 5 boys so I get a lot of "so are you going to try for a girl then?" Or similar. Seeing as I'm 41 and my youngest dc is 9 you would think it was obvious that I'm not going to "try for a girl".

get asked all the time my ds is 5, I now just tell them bluntly that I've had a hysterectomy (which I have) and watch there face fall and stumble over their words to come up with a reaction 🤣

I have two youngish kids, I still get asked if I'm having any more (I give an emphatic no!)

It's just a question people ask if you have young kids, you don't have to explain yourself, just give a non commital "we'll see" or something.

After struggling to conceive due to endometriosis I only had one child, now 27. Whenever I got asked this question I’d bluntly tell them I can’t have any more, they don’t know what to say 😬