Hello,
My partner and I have two children a 4 year old DS and 1 year old DD. Our DS is very challenging, we have suspected our had had autism, and have started the process to getting an diagnosis.
Our son can get very carried away I.e hitting when over excited/ shouting/ getting in peoples faces and shouting and screaming. In particular he is 'mean' to my partner. For example he came home tonight and just started throwing things and my partner. My partner just lost control, and really shouted at him in a loud scary tone, and forced him upstairs in his room. I have explained to him that by doing that, it's not showing our son how to control him emotions. It's also a vicious cycle as my partner will calm down and feel really guilty for his reaction... so all in all my son hasn't learnt anything from the situation, and my partner feels guilty.
How can I change this? I've explained to my partner to keep his cool, and try and not react, or take him out the situation if not safe, then speak about it when it's calmer, and explain that his behaviour is not acceptable. My partner 80% of the time can keep his cool, but then sometimes he loses it.
Are there any tools that can help my partner cope? Or better techniques for both of us?
I feel my son is losing control more often, as he probably sees it as acceptable behaviour, as he sees his dad lose control at times