Having a 2nd - will the 2 be able to share?

[rrt]

My wife's pregnant (early days, fingers crossed), and we're going to be moving flat soon. I've heard some horrible stories about young children playing with their younger siblings and hurting them, not realising that young babies are delicate.

Do you need to have them in separate rooms? At what age can / should they start sharing?

Our first was in his own room from about 4 months onwards, I would imagine it being the same with this one.

I am in favour of children sharing a room, it teaches them a lot (I shared a room as a child for many years). But am obviously concerned about safety etc.

Any tips? I can't seem to see any posts on this....

RRT (a concerned DH!)

safety not an issue since they'd be in seperate cots (i assume)

it's waking each other up that might be a problem- if they both sleep through it should be fine.

my oldest is 20mths, and sometimes he's too rough with 4mth old, but mostly he's affectionate. the oldest quickly learns that the new baby is 'real' and they mustn't be rough.

i wouldn't worry too much-things like this usually fall into place, and you'll know what feels right.

and congratulations!

Thanks SuperGrrrl, much appreciated. Exactly what I would have thought, but nice to hear you repeat this.

16 months apart - ha ha, i am sure that you've been teased in exactly the same way that we will be!

(boy will be 18 months...)

yes, i have been asked if we have a tv, and asked many times if DS2 was an accident (which he wasn't)

usually i just get 'ooh, you've got your hands full!'

mine share, dd1 is 4, 5 in july and dd2 is 2 in may

dd1 snores like a bog eel and dd2 is a terrible sleeper - they ignore each other and sleep through it - they look for each other and have a great bedtime routine going now

dd1 in a toddler bed and dd2 in cot, when dc3 arrives in july, cot will be going through into box room, dd1 get single bed and dd2 into toddler

if dc3 is another girl she'll probably end up in there too and we'll get bunkbeds for older 2

I agree with you entirely that they'll learn a lot from each other and I think you will know VERY quickly if there is something to be concerned about - try making sure that your ds is completely involved with procdess, let him chose bedding of bear to put into cot for when baby gets to sleep in big boy's room with him and hopefully he'll enjoy sharing the space too

congratulations to you and dw on pg and I hope its a happy healthy one

Hi RRT - mine are 19 months apart. When our daughter first arrive I was terrified that he'd squash/suffocate her, but she's now 5 months and much more robust and ds knows how to handle her gently - although he's a bit over affectionate. T
hey're in their own seperate rooms at the moment, but as soon as dd can sleep through reliably and ds is settled in his new big boy's bed, they're going in together. I even have some bunk beds lined up for them for when they're older!
Good luck - it's a fantastic age gap in my opinion.

Thanks guys for the messages - really appreciated! I didn't know who else to ask for advice!