Help from solo parents of multiple kids please...

[seethebeauty84]

Hey, sadly in the coming months I am highly likely to be widowed (f**k cancer) and left to raise three small kids by myself. Not only am I heartbroken and terrified of what my husband will go through, and what the kids and I will have to witness, the future fills me with fear - we're a solid team and I have no idea how to raise these kids alone. I know people do though, and do it well. Would any solo parents be able to give me some advice / reassurance please? Thank you xx

So sorry for what you are facing, so disgustingly unfair. There are some excellent charities that help children deal with the loss of a parent, and they will also signpost resources for you
Have a Macmillan benefits advisor go through your finances with you both, just to try and alleviate one immediate issue, especially as things will become quite possibly overwhelming shortly
Do you have anyone to support you emotionally? Let them know what you need. Your children will still have their wonderful parent in you, and the reassurance and happy memories of your joint parenting in due course. All you can do is prepare as best you can, identify any support you need and just get through one day at a time x

Thanks so much @Blackbyrd . Really helpful advice. I've starting seeing a therapist since this all happened and I've got supportive friends. You just don't want to overburden people though. The thing is, I've been grieving since his diagnosis and am going to be grieving for a long time and I feel like surely people will get bored of that. And I just cannot imagine going from 50:50 teamwork with my husband in parenting to raising these 3 tiny kids all by myself, 24/7, 365 days a year. x

Its ok to just 'get by' for a while. It's ok for you to grieve and it is ok for you to not be a perfect Mum. You'll draw strength from your children and you will just do it. I'm so sorry you're going through this.

I'm a solo parent of 3, for very different reasons but I lost my Dad at the same time as their Dad left. I was barely there mentally for almost 2 years, coasted along and just did what I could so we all survived. A few years later, we have it all together again and life is better. The kids have been so resilient through it all and are doing well despite everything.

@Stressfordays Thank you for your kindness and I'm so sorry that happened to you. It gives me hope that you pulled through and life is easier now x