Did you bf one child longer than another?

[spiralizeme]

I breastfed DD1 for 5 months but I plan to breastfeed my next baby for much longer.

I kinda feel guilty for this.

If you breastfed babies for different lengths of times, I'd love to hear.

Thanks in advance xxx

DS1 I BF for 6 months. DS2 is currently 8 months, breastfeeding is going well and plan to feed until he's at least 1

DD1 wouldn't breastfeed directly so I exclusively pumped for four months. DD2 did breastfeed directly so everything was much easier and I breastfed for 9.5 months.

Yes
DC 8 months
DC2 11 months as wouldn’t take a bottle for love or money and eventually self weaned

Yep, DC1 for 5months. I stopped because the health visitor told me that was why they weren’t sleeping through and to move to a bottle. They didn’t sleep through until they were over a year old…
DC2 for 2 years until they self weaned. I very rarely saw the health visitor and ignored comments about still feeding them.
I wish I’d never listened to the 1st Health Visitor.

4 years for the first, 2.5 for the second. I'm getting a bit fed up feeding DC3 (1y10m) and would like to stop.

So I've done the opposite really

No, I don't feel guilty. It's impossible to raise your children exactly the same in every way. I adapted to the circumstances as I had the opportunity and feeling to.

I think this is a very natural thing to worry about before the second child comes along, when your only experience is that one single baby and you can't picture it being any different. Once they are here, you realise that they are totally separate people with their own personality and issues, and trying to be "fair" to them is completely impossible, inappropriate and will stress you out.

Do your best including balancing the needs of everyone (which includes yours!) if BF is working out longer next time around and you're both happy then carry on. What would be the benefit of introducing formula if you don't need to?

Many mums find the experience of breastfeeding a second baby when the first time didn't go as planned is very healing.

DC1 12m - it was my decision to stop as we started TTC and I didn't fancy being pregnant and breastfeeding
DC2 11m - she self weaned
DC3 8m - I put him on formula in a desperate attempt to improve his sleep (it didn't make much difference)

I breastfed first until 16 months (I was 5 months pregnant) and second until her second birthday.

Yeh got a bit more confident each time and gave less of a f about the opinions of others, bf my eldest 1 year and youngest 2 years.

Yes I did, but I think the breastfeeding question is somewhat of a red herring!
I also had a better quality car seat for the second child, but then feel I spent less quality time with them when the third child came along.
First child had more 1:1 time as a young child, but second and third have had more experiences as we are in a different financial situation now. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Each child has some things better and some things worse than their siblings.

Making the choices we feel are best in each moment is all we can do, please don't feel guilty or try to compare what you do at different times with different children or you'll drive yourself bonkers 😬
Fair won't always mean the same, and we'll often get it wrong but that's ok 🙃

DC 1: 3 months
DC 2: 1 year
DC 3: still going at 17 months

I don't feel guilty. I was in a different place each time.

It does depend on the baby too - I BF my first (by the end it was just first thing in the morning) until he was 3 and my milk dried up when I got pregnant with his little brother, so he was hurting me trying to extract some (it had also started happening during my period, so my body was clearly ready to stop).

My youngest was about 8 months, but entirely lead by him - pretty much as soon as he tried food he lost all interest in milk - the child was an eating machine!

First 2 days (I couldn't manage it)
Second 6 weeks (also struggled)
Third 3 years (had an excellent breastfeeding volunteer who came to my home and showed me how to do it)

It has made no difference to my bond with my children nor their childhood health.

You do what works at the time. I’ve fed 2 out of 4 myself. No2 son he self weaned at a year and no4 16 months I was back to work so that helped with winding down but I missed it. No guilt whatsoever

Yes, I exclusively breastfed them both for 6 weeks then started mix feeding them both.

Eldest was fully on formula at 12 weeks. I hated breastfeeding them, it remained horrendously painful throughout and eventually as they were having a greater proportion of bottle feeds vs breast they also then preferred the bottle, so we stopped a little sooner than planned. I was upset but also relieved and in hindsight I actually wish I had just stopped it much earlier, it wasn't worth all the pain and mental ill health it caused me and it negatively affected our bond for a long time thereafter.

Youngest was fully on formula at 10 months. They were hardly drinking milk, it was a very hot summer, they drank more formula than breastmilk so gradually weaned on to formula in the day and they just had breast at night. Then they started sleeping through so that was that. I was fine with this and thought it was good timing as they started nursery a few weeks later. However, it was soul destroying when they resumed night wakings approximately one month later and then I had no milk left/ they had forgotten how to latch etc so the nights were then much harder which was grim.

DC1: 10.5 months and I felt pressure to stop
DC2: difficult situation as had to be tube fed and gave high calorie formula but tried for the first few months to give some expressed milk too
DC3: 21 months. Much more confident to continue until ready to give up that time.