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Parenting

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Original poster

Did anyone NOT give their DC a 1st birthday party?

107 replies

Mummy2022FT · 05/07/2023 18:57

Money is tight. He'll only be 1 so he won't understand it's even his birthday.

(I am going to do a small 'get together' of family and close friends at home. But not an actual proper party with bubbles and a bouncy castle and whatever else.... )

Anyone else not hold a 'proper' party for their baby?

OP posts:

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Set a reminder

RedToothBrush · 05/07/2023 19:47

I didnt have one.

What's the fucking point?

They are one!

Oldermum84 · 05/07/2023 19:47

1st birthday we were in lockdown. Just had a day out for 2nd and 3rd birthdays. I'll have a newborn when he turns 4 so I'm not doing a party then. He may have a party when he turns 5, we'll ask him then what he wants to do.

SweetAndSourChick3n · 05/07/2023 19:48

Proper party at age 4 for each DC, family get togethers with cake before that.

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InceyWinceySpidy · 05/07/2023 19:50

Nope. DTwins had a COVID first birthday, where we sat indoors, DNan and DM sat outside, separated on the patio, and we had cake, and opened a few pressies while they sat in highchairs munching the fondant teddies off their cake. It was lovely. No stress. Could actually take some lovely pictures.

DS1 we just had a few family members over, shared some cake, pressies, had some balloons for him to bat about. Again, nothing huge, but lovely. When he started school, we did massive parties, mobile zoos, hired planetariums, science parties, all with huge decor etc, from age 4 to 9. After that, back to more low key, cinema with a few mates and a pizza express etc. I think parties under 4 are a bit pointless, then you have plenty of years to go big and have fun, the years when it's really wow for them. I would just mark the early years occasions with nearest and dearest, and get plenty of photos with family members.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 05/07/2023 19:51

We didn't. We just went for a walk and had cake. Like you say, 1 year olds don't know.

Peony654 · 05/07/2023 19:52

I don’t know anyone who DID have a party for 1st birthday!

Caterina99 · 05/07/2023 19:53

Nope. We had friends over for cake who also had a similar aged baby, but that was it. No family locally and it’s not like the 1 year old knew! DH and I high fived each other on surviving the first year.

I think both of my DC had a party in the back garden with a few of my friends and their little ones from age 3, and a “proper” party - ie inviting their actual friends from 4 or 5. With covid thrown in there cancelling some of them.

VillageLite · 05/07/2023 19:55

I didn’t do a proper party for 1st birthday.
For eldest, my uncle came over for lunch and we went for a walk. Then friend came round with her baby and we had tea and cake together (which we did most weeks anyway)
For youngest, I made a cake, 3 or 4 friends from playgroup came round for cake, and just played with toys for a couple of hours while the mums chatted. We sang happy birthday, and eldest blew out the candle.
Nice to mark the occasion, but any party will be for you, not the baby, so it’s whatever you want to organise. It was nice to see a few friends but I prefer things low key.

AuntieMarys · 05/07/2023 19:56

We didn't for either of them. Nor a 2nd.

tulipsunday · 05/07/2023 19:56

No he had his first party this year aged 3. Just had a few family members over previously 😊

Blarn · 05/07/2023 20:00

We had my parents and brother round, ate some food, blew out a candle on a cake I had made. That was enough, they get overwhelmed, tired and grumpy. We took dd2 to a zoo (more for dd1 tbh) then had some cake.

Any big party just seems like a waste of money. The one year old won't know what's going on, none of the adults will really want to be there (honestly, is that how you'd like to spend a Saturday) and the parents will just be knackered from throwing a party.

Hellocatshome · 05/07/2023 20:03

In fact the only parties my two had was 1 in reception as its a nice way to meet the other parents etc and 1 in year 6 as they can do something a bit more grown up such as go karting etc and its a nice memory as they won't all go on to the same school for year 7. Every other birthday is some sort of family day out and cake or now they are teens its more like try to squeeze a cake in around whatever they have planned with their friends.

FinallyLeavingDenver · 05/07/2023 20:09

We only did parties once they were at school, even then only on a couple of birthdays as they preferred a day out with us or a couple of friends.

TwistofFate · 05/07/2023 20:09

We just had a wee party for my daughter with both sets of grandparents. We still had presents, balloons and a cake, but that was enough for her.

I don't feel guilty because she won't remember it anyway, and we've been to a few big birthday parties for toddlers and the kids often seem overwhelmed by it.

HHx · 05/07/2023 20:12

Im waiting until my son is 3 to do a birthday party for the first time. He’s about to be 2 and we are just going to go somewhere for the day that he’d actually enjoy rather than spend a fortune on all the birthday party stuff. They don’t have a clue at 1. You can sing happy birthday and make a fuss without hiring a hall or spending £100s

ChateauMargaux · 05/07/2023 20:13

When my youngest turned one.. his brother and sister made me feel guilty for not giving him a party so I went slightly crazy making a completely over the top Martha Stewart cake creation requiring several trips to the supermarket for more icing .. .

When he was 2, he was really ill before his birthday and it took my good friend to tell me that a 2 year old would not mind if he had a tea party the following week...

He had some pretty awesome parties in primary school... we have run out of enthusiasm for his secondary years though..

ElFupacabra · 05/07/2023 20:17

Nope. We were actually at a festival for her 1st birthday thanks to covid rescheduling but I wouldn’t have anyway. We had grandparents around for a bbq the following weekend. Will likely be the same for her 2nd minus the festival. She doesn’t know what’s going on and doesn’t start nursery till after her birthday so won’t have any friends to invite anyway 😂

trrk · 05/07/2023 20:18

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Jk987 · 05/07/2023 20:19

Just a card and a sing song and a few friends and family. Why do you feel so pressured? I blame social media!

Allhailkingcharlie · 05/07/2023 20:20

Yep. What's the point? They won't remember!!

FlounderingFruitcake · 05/07/2023 20:20

My youngest has also spent his first 2 travelling to go skiing- his fault for being born Feb HT!

BHRK · 05/07/2023 20:21

Cake and balloons with family at home until age 4

Moonshine160 · 05/07/2023 20:23

No party here.

We had family visiting throughout the day for tea and cake but that was it. DS1 wasn’t on a nap schedule so some actually turned up when he was napping! And we went to the farm for a couple of hours. Will do the same for DS2 who is currently 9
months old. A proper party is pointless.

Simplelobsterhat · 05/07/2023 20:25

In my head I had parties for both, but they were small get togethers of close family and one friend so I can see on your definition they didn't count as parties! Cake, party food, dining happy birthday. With the second some toys, sand pit etc pit in the garden and pass the parcel because by then there were more children in the family to attend. The first was more sitting round chatting and helping dd open her presets as all adults and one other younger baby. But I think of them as parties! You are in for putting a lot of pressure on yourself if you dint think you've had a party without a bouncy castle!

It was very much more for the adults (and older siblings second time round) so no mum guilt needed even if you don't do anything at all! Your DC won't know or care!

stargirl1701 · 05/07/2023 21:09

We only did the grandparents and godparents for the 1st birthday party.

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