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4-year old prefers daddy - will it change?

3 replies

Likesicecream · 28/06/2023 18:51

DH and I usually alternate more or less putting DS4 and DD2 to bed. Lately DS always wants daddy to put him to bed, we stick to our guns so if I’m planning on putting him to bed that night, I do. We have the same routine no matter who does it, books etc, once he’s gotten over not getting daddy we have a nice time.

One night I asked him why he wants daddy to do it, he said “because he’s my favourite.”

Tonight DH asked him if he would like it if mummy or daddy came to stay and play at nursery sometime, not meaning for it to be a choice between us, but DS immediately said “I want daddy to come!”

I’m just so down about it. I work full time but like most mums I end up doing more than 50% of the parenting, most of the mental load, etc etc. I’m always trying to figure out a way I can go part time or work less so that I can be there more, especially when he starts school soon. It hurts that he likes daddy better, DH is a great dad so I’m glad they have a bond but I kind of think I’m a great mum too! And I don’t really think I am disciplining him more or being stricter, or doing less fun stuff with him.

i know I shouldn’t get worked up about it but I wanted to vent and to know if others have had similar experiences and did things change? I know younger kids have mummy phases and daddy phases, and we went through both of those, but it feels different now that he can voice it so definitively!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Bluebelles23 · 29/06/2023 00:28

My little boy goes through phases of who of us is the favourite, we are like you and alternate nights so he has equal time. At the moment he always wants me to put him down but we just say we both like reading the stories so we take turns.

He loves you both but perhaps he sees Daddy as more fun at the moment or maybe he's seeing less of Daddy and wants more time.

I wouldnt let it upset you as it'll all change again soon

Likesicecream · 02/07/2023 19:36

Thank you that does make me feel better!! X

OP posts:
lemonyellows · 02/07/2023 19:46

It's just a phase, honestly. Totally normal. Be happy with the break and let your DH crack on 😀

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