Daytime sleep non existent. Advice needed.

[Ric1988]

our 13 week old really struggles with daytime naps. He doesn’t go down very easily during the day even when he is showing sleepy cues. I have tried everything I’ve read/been advised by HV including dark quiet rooms, pram, next2me, rocking chair, swaddling, bouncer, contact naps etc. It’s like he is fighting to stay awake and then is super grumpy and fussy because he is overtired. It’s getting to the point I can’t even go for a wee let alone do washing/tidy up etc because he is demanding constant attention and crying because he is overtired. Today he has had 3x 30 min naps but is showing me he is tired every couple of hours. He sleeps well at night and goes down straight away (waking 4-5 hours for a feed) but after the first night feed is wide awake and again won’t sleep back in bed.
recently diagnosed vsd and under cardiology and awaiting specialist review (in case this is related although I think that should make him more sleepy). Taking omeprazole for silent reflux.
Can anyone offer advice? I’m at my wits end.

Are you following age appropriate wake windows/ nap gaps? This guide is good: https://www.careitout.com/blog/infant-nap-gaps-guide

Have you tried taking him for a walk in the baby carrier? Or a dummy?

It can be really frustrating when they won’t nap, but sometimes they just fight it and it’s best to try let it go!

Yes we are following the guides for his age but also his cues (the yawns/rubbing eyes etc). Going off that he should be getting double the sleep he currently is. It’s very frustrating as he clearly needs the sleep but it’s like something is preventing him.

He occasionally sleeps in a carrier but often just screams and doesn’t settle. Same with taking him in the pram really. Dummy is a no go as he has never had one as he gags and spits it out (has a tongue tie under treatment currently).

White noise? Hoover used to help my reluctant sleeper.

It is frustrating, especially when you know they need the sleep and they just don’t do it. I think at this age it’s useful to feed to sleep for naps and at bedtime too. I fed my eldest to sleep with the breast, and later a bottle, until she was nearly 12 months at nap times as it was part of our routine for sleep.