Entertaining 6yo & 1 yo?

[LillyCandC]

Hi everyone! Just trying to get my head around what to do 1) after school 2) during summer hols with my kids?
6yo is into football, very physical play… won’t do Lego or puzzles however he would spend the whole day watching TV if I let him.
1 yo is walking and being a monkey as in needing mum all the time. I feel like im failing my older son. I can’t play uno, snakes and ladders with him and I can’t play football (1yo always wants to be involved - chasing the ball), play dates are a bit of a nightmare as boys tend to destroy the house. Village play park is very boring for my 6 yo. What on Earth do I do so that neither of them feel left out? At the moment, 6 yo has 1.5 hours of screen time per day allowance so he watches cartoons and plays switch when he comes back from school and then just follows me around the house and moans that there’s nothing to do as he’s bored. Meanwhile I’m trying to sort dinner out and keep 1 yo from smashing his head in. I feel like I’m failing as a parent. Not to add that my husband never gets any attention.
also, we just moved into a new house so no friends or family around.

With that age the best thing is to get them out of the house. We're in a big city and there are loads of playgrounds nearby, some of them have big climbing structures and zip wire, splash park etc so more interesting for the older one. We check blogs and photos on Google maps to see what kind of play equipment they have and take my dc across town to check out all the best ones.

Check the days out with kids website for local attractions, and your local council's website. Ours does free and subsidised sports activities for the older age. The younger one would be able to go to a children's centre or library for activities.

Depends on your area but there are lots of free festival/fair days near us throughout the summer.

I have put my older one into some summer camps for a week here and there doing things like gymnastics, drama, dance. It does cost but a nice way for them to try out activities if you can afford it.

Thanks @feawn! There isn’t as much choice as I live in a small village so it’s mainly countryside and not much culture. I think i probably need to start planning our trips out though, must be the way forward - even to play with sticks and feed the ducks

Can your dh take one of them out for a walk each evening when he gets in from work? Just a 30-45 mins kick about with the ball for the elder or a walk to the swings with the baby? Then there's some time for 1.2.1 with the other one for you.

It sounds like if you could find a more challenging and different playground for the 6 year old then it would help. Assuming that you can drive then I think it would be good to explore playgrounds in a wider radius.

Is the 1yo still napping?

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz yes, but second nap finishes at 3. my DH does take him out to play or to swim 3 times a week. Still… I find there’s a lot of time to waste before bed.

@BoohooWoohoo true! I think it will be better when the baby drops down to one nap 😴

Screens stimulate children too much and decrease their desire for other things. I would start by talking about screen time with your 6yo and agreeing on a set of rules for using it. Even if he is bored, don't go to screens as your rescue. Tell your 6 yo it is part of life to learn to deal with boredom, along with suggesting two or three things he could do. You know, delayed gratification and self-direction.

I would also try to engage DH more in taking care of either child. His care doesn't need to be perfect. You should get out of the house when he is taking care. Find some time for yourself. Self-care is the beginning of better care for your family.

Last, I would try to find something that I enjoy doing with my 6yo and do it regularly while 1yo is napping / sleeping / away. I have a 2yo and a 7yo. The 2yo naps 12:30-230 and goes to bed 45min earlier than 6yo. We use these times to do one-on-one with 7yo. DS1/DD1 needs to have more 1-on-1 time with parents, since they experienced the "difference" before and after DS2/DD2.

Hope this helps!

I have similar with a 5yr old and a 1yr old.. I used to save special things like botzee, Lego building etc for when youngest was napping but recently he has been refusing so it’s been a bit more tricky. We also live rural and are a 2hr drive to the nearest city. I plan lots of days out with his friends and take 1yr old with us and do a lot of activities but they are going to stop over summer hols. When at home, they both enjoy being in the garden on the trampoline and Wooden climbing frame.. helping with the raised beds and playing in the sandpit.. eldest also love his nerf (we only allow outdoor play with them and shoot only at his targets) ..it’s just trying to find things they can both enjoy together. Craft-ernoons are always a hit here and both can participate (painting, playdoh, air dry clay etc) or baking. Eldest helps measure, mix, crack the eggs etc and youngest helps with mixing and general mess making lol we do lots of bike rides with eldest too and one yr old either goes in buggy or his trike