6 year old still sleeps with us

[Anxiousmummy1187]

My son Turned 6 in January and he’s always slept with us. We did manage to get him to sleep in his own bed during lock down but then it’s come back to he sleeps with us or so his dad as I’ve taken his bed as it was a squeeze 😂 it doesn’t bother us, or me my partner would like him in his own bed but I’m happy as dad snores 😂😂

I’m trying to find ways of getting him into his own bed as a mum at school today mentioned it and said it was odd how he was still sleeping with us 🫣 he is scared of monsters he says

Its not odd at all, lots of children still sleep in their parents' bed. Mine included, and he's almost 10. I wish I had some advice for you, but I am also stuck for ways to get him to sleep in his own bed 😩

New bedding, a new toy that arrives saying that they keep the monsters away and help him sleep, ds had this and it really worked. He still crept in but not because he was scared. Night light is good to. He is still little.

I'm way off this stage as my daughter is only 1.5 so no advice but IMO what's odd is her even voicing that in the first place! You do what works best for you and your family 🤘

Same here !

That mum was incredibly rude.

We are still co sleeping at 4 and DC does not want to stop, despite much encouragement. I am hoping that at some point something will happen developmentally and she will decide she wants her own space. I feel like this might happen naturally by 7 as this is the beginning of 2nd plane (Montessori).

My dc was like this, he start off in his bed and then come into ours, at 7 something changed within him and he just started sleeping in his bed for the whole night. Last night was the first time he came in in weeks. I think it’s their own anxiety/worry and if you relax about it they do too.

My DD is a few years older than your DC. She's in her own bed for a few months, then back in with me for a bit. I don't mind and i know eventually she'll be in her bed all the time. You are allowed to do things differently from the mum at school if you're happy with the way things are.

Fair enough if you want to stop the bed sharing because it’s no longer working for your family but to change up something you’re all happy with because a bitchy woman on the school run made a rude comment would be complete madness.

This is my DD. I am currently decorating/updating her room so it’s more grown up. I’m then going to offer incentives for sleeping in her own bed! If it doesn’t work then it doesn’t work!

It’s not like they’ll be in with us when they’re teens!

It’s biologically normal! Kids want to be close to their parents - our ancestors wouldn’t have left kids sleeping alone to be eaten by wolves/bears/lions etc! We’re primates and we would have shared sleep spaces.

My dd is in with me if she has nightmares etc
etc.

If her dad works away she's in with me and if I work away she opts to stay in with DH to watch a film to fall asleep to.

The nights she is in her own bed, that's her choice. However at seven she was still in with us a lot more than she is now.

Now it just usually if one of us is away. You can't get three of us in comfortably anymore.

It works for us.

DS is 9. Every night settles in his own bed. Most nights he makes his way to our bed and nods off between us. If you hear him coming you can turn him round and get him back to bed but once he's in ours he is too heavy to lift back.

DS7 comes in from time to time.
I keep hoping they'll grow out of it

My now 19 year old slept with us until he was 10, I think he realised that it wasn't cool as he would be moving onto high school... my 6 year old is in our bed still, we're currently decorating his room, but if he's with us for another 4 years I don't really mind. They are only little for such a short time, and you will miss the cuddles once they become moody teenagers x

according to your post, you are trying to change your sleeping arrangement based on what "a mum at school" said

Despite her judgemental language, ultimately she is merely giving you information on her own opinions. I would think "thanks I'll bear that in mind" would be sufficient response.

It's odd for that mum because it's not her norm. Totally normal for a lot of people.

I personally couldn't care less where my son sleeps as long as I get some sleep!

It's not odd at all. It's really comforting and nice for children to sleep with their parents. I slept with both my kids until about 2 years ago because the bed was getting too squeezy for 3 of us as they got bigger. DD6 still comes to our bed in the middle of the night sometimes and it's no bother. When DH is away it's a treat for the children as they get to sleep with mummy again!

Everyone wants to bedshare = absolutely fine to bedshare and no one else's business.

Someone doesn't want to bedshare anymore = time to make some new arrangements. Still no one else's business.

The end.

This

She can think what she likes. Isn't there anything that she does in her life that you think is odd? Surely everyone does something that other people think is odd.

I definitely wouldn't change something in my life that I was happier with because some school mother declared it odd.

DD is 5 and still in with me at night (DH has decamped to her bed which works well as he often does a late shift and doesn’t get in til 1/2am). It works for us, assume she will grow out of it sometime before she’s 18!

Our 9 and 12 year olds still get in with us (we have a King sized bed). They each start in their own beds but invariably I wake up to find one and/or the other snoozing away. We don't care, as long as everyone gets sleep that's the important thing.

I came looking for reassurance as my son is just 5, nearly 6 and he refuses to sleep alone and always gets in our bed. My husband moans about it. I'm fine with it as he's my last little one. If he decides to sleep right next to me I'll occasionally leave him in our bed and retreat to his bed. Glad to see this is totally normal :)

My 5 year old DD sleeps with us. From 6 months she was great at sleeping in her own room but at 4 years she started getting scared. We have our double bed and joined her single bed so one massive bed. We love it. I think I’ll be sad inside when she wants to sleep in her own room now😂