If your child was negative about everything at 3ish, how did they turn out?

[SoooBloodyTired]

Just this really! Did you have a child who was a bit ‘anti’ everything, bossy and grumpy, and how did they turn out? Is there hope that my little girl will turn out to be a warm, kind, thoughtful, enthusiastic individual who is happy for me to choose my own colour felt tip, or is this my life now??

Ten years on, my once extremely defiant, aggressive, wild child toddler is calm, considerate, funny and charming. Even she can’t understand how or why she used to behave the way she did. Continue to hold strong boundaries and clear expectations for a high standard of behaviour and you will get there. The shift happened for us at about 5.5 years old.

@ThePoint678 ah thank you, that’s encouraging! I sometimes sit racking my brain trying to think which aspects of my parenting have created such a grump!

Not grown up but my nearly 6 year old is still miserable as sin! So grumpy unless we are doing things on his terms!

@trevthecat it’s quite draining isn’t it? Has he always been the same?

Between about the ages of about 3-7 I thought DS was very grumpy and just generally unpleasant a lot of the time, I really didn't enjoy a lot of those years with him (obviously I loved him to pieces anyway!).
He's now 18 and one of the kindest, funniest people around. He just loves life, gets on with everyone and we sailed through the teenage years with barely a cross word. Hopefully you've got all this to look forward too!

@BackToWhereItAllBegan it’s a shame you had a bit of a slog for a few years but brilliant that he turned out so well! I suppose you sort of had the equivalent of a tough teenage phase out of the way very early!

My dd was extremely grumpy and negative, it was literally exhausting. I remember finding a diary she'd written when she was about 7/8 and had reasons she wanted to die, with things like 'shop didn't have my crisps', and 'I have no good toys' (she had loads!). You couldn't do anything without her ruining it and being a complete Debbie Downer. She used to say she wasn't afraid of death as she had nothing good to live for 🤔. I got really concerned and she was referred to CAHMS around 9/10 who said she was fine but just had a very naturally negative personality. She's a mid teen now and has improved somewhat but is generally a negative person.

My son became very grumpy and angry with lots of things at the age of about 3.5, having been super laid-back and relaxed. He’s about to turn eight and that’s still very much him. He is lovely, intelligent and so wonderful, but he is one of those people that seems to find life harder than average or makes it harder than average for himself. He will always, always find the negative in something rather than the positive. By now he’s aware of that himself, and sometimes says he wishes he wasn’t so grumpy and angry. But a lot of his friends at school are similar. So we weather it and talk about how his mood can affect the rest of us and a lot of the time he is wonderful to spend time with. Overall I’m confident that while he might always be a glass half empty person, he will get better at regulating his emotions and be better equipped to deal with them. And that’s very much what we try to help him do. But it is hard, hard work.