Alone on the playground. Tell me why I feel so stupid.

[Isleofwhy]

Maybe this is anxiety induced, I don’t know.
Basically, single mum, DS is 27m.
We live in a flat but there’s a park 5 minutes walk away where we are going on a daily basis, mostly in the mornings and a lot of times, like 9 out of 10 we are the only ones there and I have this feeling that maybe he doesn’t enjoy it that much being there alone, I tend to think that everyone is somewhere else doing something more productive, you know drawing and PlayDoh or going to pet zoo, soft play or any other experiences or anything and it’s only us the miserable ones outside 10 in the morning on a empty playground.
Hopefully someone gets what I mean..

Can you arrange to take a friend for him?

My kids were always happy to play at home (also in a flat) but I’d have felt ‘inferior’ to you, being organised enough to have him up and out in the fresh air in the morning!

See if you can team up with another parent - I can almost guarantee that there are others who would sob with gratitude if you took their DC to the park of a morning, and might even be able to return the favour either at that time or in another way.

(Also: unstructured free time like that is really, really good for kids - and adults - so don’t feel like more ‘exciting’ activities are somehow more worthy.)

Maybe at 10 in the morning, stay at home parents/weekends aren't dressed yet. I never got to the park before afternoon (we would make appointments, scheduled stuff but not just the park!)

Time outside is really good for kids! It sounds like you’re doing well. Try not to worry about what everyone else is doing, they’re probably comparing themselves to you

What about trying to find some new playground? I have an app called playground buddy.

I was stunned during covid times to find I had 5 very close playgrounds, I only knew about 2. If I was willing to range further, I had even more and some were great.

Ps I think he’s still having fun. But must be like Groundhog Day for you so worth trying to shake things up a bit!

I often take my 18 month to the park and playground in the morning, if we're not at a toddler group. Especially in the hot weather lately, as with an 8 week old it's either go out to be back by 10ish or don't go out. Mt toddler enjoys on her own and with others. We often are the only ones for the first half hour or so

I will guarantee that there are a ton of other mothers of pre-school children looking out of the window and being impressed that you get your child out to the park every day so he gets fresh air and exercise, and don't go mad with the repetitive playground games, and feeling a failure that they don't do the same.

Paid experiences are unnecessary at this age. Spending time with you is fantastic!

Round here most playgroups/classes are in the morning so generally the playgrounds are quieter so toddlers are off at those. Afternoons are usually busy though if the weather is good. I usually go about 9 after the school drop off but before playgroup on the days I'm off so I'd be done by the time you get there!

I think everyone has different schedules and you just have to make the most of it. Personally I bloody love an empty playground so I can have a go on the swings!

Your dc is just over 2yo.
Hé doesn’t care about ‘friends’ yet.

You have a routine that works for you. It doesn’t matter if most other people don’t follow the same routine :):)
However, giving your dc the space and opportunity to be outside, run around etc… is great.This us something he enjoys (I assume so if this is something you do everydayM). I think you are doing great.

Oh and btw soft play is like the lark but inside
No one goes to the pet farm every week, let alone everyday.
And the drawing/playdoh is our idealised view of what parenting should be. A lot if parents never do that everyday with their kids either. I certainly didn’t.

Children don't even start playing together until they are closer to 3.
Parents that work probably aren't up and ready for the day at 10, catching up on chores from the week. Parents with older children are probably running them around to swimming lessons and parties etc in the morning and won't get to the park till the afternoon.

I used to jazz my trips to the park up when DD was small by walking to the farthest one away in walking distancey, take a coffee and some headphones and then park hop back home visiting lots of different parks. I found going to the same one all the time boring.

What do you think makes you the miserables ones for being at the park?

Routine and familiar places are important to children as is physical play.

Going to the park in the morning is great, you could take some crayons and paper and do some bark/surface rubbing. Take a bucket and collect twigs and leaves for an art project in the afternoon or on a rainy day when you don't fancy going out. Play fog etc is great but serves a very different purpose to child development, I used to keep some in the kitchen and DD would play with it whilst in her high chair when I was making dinner.

If you are bored then stick a headphone in and listen to a podcast for some inane adult background chatter.

It's almost summer so start keeping an eye on free community things to go to like summer fares, your DC might be too young to fully take part but can still enjoy the sights and sounds.

Do you play with him at the park? You can be just as much fun as another child would be! I don't know what is at the park but you could always try some new things - taking some bubbles to blow bubbles for him, taking a ball to throw and kick, taking a teddy and pretending the teddy talks (and you do the talking for the teddy or the teddy whispers answers to you). Sing some nursery rhymes to him while he's playing or recite 'We're going on a bear hunt' and act it out. Just be silly with him and have some fun. You could take a little picnic and have it at the park after he's finished playing. I think it's lovely that you have a park so close and you can take him everyday - absolutely nothing miserable about that at all.

I love going to the park with my kids when it’s empty because it means you don’t have to deal with other kids being badly behaved and left unsupervised by their parents! Also don’t have to wait to go on the equipment or, my least favourite, when you attract a child won’t stop following your kid and who decides that they want to go on whatever my child is on as soon as they get on it (I’m talking about equipment that only fits one child at a time so I either have to keep moving my kid on before he’s had a proper turn or deal with the follower child stood 5cm away and just staring at us for the duration).

your feelings are of course valid, I just mean that there can be some real positives to going to the park when it’s empty. Like others have said, often the parks don’t get busy til 11am onwards. Kudos to you for getting your child up and out to the park for fresh air and exercise most days, that’s a really good habit to have!

It sounds to me as though you are doing very well, don't worry keep it up!

Sounds great to me!

I try to get my toddlers out Tothe playground most mornings. Fresh air, free play, opportunity to practise various skills e.g. climbing/running/balancing. What could possibly be better!

Save the playdo, crayons etc for rubbish weather. Think about the structureof any nursery or primary school day. They get the kids outside 2 or 3 times a day if the weather is good. It's good for them!