Kids telling eachother how babies are made

[mumarooni]

Ive always been honest with my dd who is now 6, and answered her questions. So far she had understood that sperm and egg makes babies, different ways they can come out, periods, etc. But this morning she asked what starts the baby off growing and how the sperm get in there. I answered honestly and we chatted for a bit. Then I worried that she might know more than her friends and maybe I should say something about not chatting to friends about it, I know I was pleased to do the talk myself in my own way and other parents likely to prefer that to playground chat maybe before their child is ready. So I garbled something about not talking to friends about it for now. But then I worried I'd introduced shame, secrecy and scandal type vibes. What did you do, not about the sex talk itself, but the chat between kids...did you try to prevent it or not? Or did you have a good or bad or neutral experience about them chatting to eachother about it at this age? Can't decide whether to revisit/repaie when I pick her up or not. 🤷🥴

I wouldn't say any more unless she asks. I was always very open and answered questions honestly but never told them to not tell friends. Kids talk about it anyway (some more knowledgeablely than others!)

My friends is very good at this sort of stuff and described it as a 'special cuddle'

But I wouldn't revisit it unless she brings it up

Its not the telling her bit I am so worried about, I think I did ok on that. It was more the telling her not to tell her friends bit that felt shady!

Yip I know what you mean. I would say nothing more.
But I wouldn't tell her not to say again. Because your right that's getting into the dodgy ground of keeping secrets.

Keeping surprises is OK, but not secrets.

I explained to my very curious child that mums and dads usually like to choose when their children hear about this stuff so it's better to leave it to them rather than talking about it in the playground but that if it slips out not to worry about it.

Just answer her questions. You don't need to tell her what to say or not to say to other children. I'm sure you were absolutely appropriate in your explanation and she will be glad for that.

No harm will come to another child who is accidentally told something factual, unlike the many poor kids who get to hear all sorts of stuff from older brothers talking about porn.

I don't like the special cuddle stuff, but ended up using it at 7am one day when the questions were coming thick and fast and DH and I hadn't discussed or agreed how we wanted to approach this.

Just meant that a few days later I was asked why we hadn't done the special cuddle two more times so she could have two big brothers like her friend.

Thanks for the responses. yes that makes sense. I can think of how I wish I'd said that bit now! But hopefully no big harm done. What is that thing about being a 'good enough' mother?! I'll chalk it up to that and look for opportunities to make sure she doesn't feel too much responsibility or secrecy over that info if something comes up.

My daughter asked me what impotence is yesterday. I was a tad hungover and not ready for that one. Said it was a question for another day.

Looked at her homework and she actually meant omnipotent.

I would generate answer questions in an age appropriate and truthfully, we're quite open about things. I wouldn't tell her not to say anything, kids are curious and they will have friends who are having siblings and chalking up al kind of weird and wonderful ways for babies to be made.