18m old madness, how do you get anything done?

[Newperson4]

I’m really struggling with my 18m old son, he is an absolute whirlwind and has boundless energy, he is quite destructive and tends to have big tantrums when he’s told “no”

I’m finding it hard to get myself dressed and ready for the day with him around, I used to do shower/makeup when he had his morning nap but now he iphas a midday nap I have to do it with him around. If I put him in his cot he screams and screams and it stresses me out, if I bring him in the bathroom he trashes the place and he can undo the lock on the door.

When I try to do my makeup I bring him into my room and shut the door, i’ve tried toys, books, objects in a treasure basket for him to look at but he will instead trash my room, tip out the washing, pull the lamps off the side or scream and hang off the door handle. Or if i let him explore upstairs he will chuck himself off beds or try to break down the stair gate.

I know people will say, oh dont bother with makeup etc but I already feel shit about my body image, 10mins to put some makeup on generally makes me feel better about myself.

What do people do!?

Can you do your makeup while he’s sat in his high chair having breakfast? That’s what I do with 13 month old DD, I think I’ll be more in your position in a little while though so I’m placemarking for advice!

I get myself showered and dressed before I get him up. I like a good shower so it's the ONLY way to enjoy it!

Mine was like this too, it's like putting a tiny whirlwind down in your room. No fun at all. Put him in the cot with a tablet to watch - 10 minutes of In the Night Garden isn't going to hurt.

Playpen! DC love the playpen. Toys in it, sometimes balloons.

I also don't bother with makeup. Is it totally 'necessary' for you? Sounds like ditching it would relieve some of the pressure.

I found this such a hard age. I used to do everything I needed to do before DH left for work.

Do as much as you can before you get him up/when he naps. Try and accept that when he is awake you can't do much. It's so tedious but fighting it just makes life more stressful. It isn't permanent, as with everything, just a phase. All said with sympathy - it is so annoying! I am amazed how much I can get done in 20 mins these days - pre baby me wouldn't recognise myself in terms of efficiency!

I've always got ready while DD is awake. I just put toys out for her and she plays with them, or sometimes doesn't. My bedroom is reasonably safe so I just let her explore drawers, climb on bed, pull sheets out etc. Chaos but quickly tidied and as long as my face is sorted and I'm dressed that's the main thing. She likes it when I sing to her while I'm doing stuff, it distracts her from causing mischief.

I Shower in the evening, and don’t bother with make up.

I try not to shower when I'm on my own with an 18mo! I do it before DH leaves for work, or in the evening.

I don't wear make up - but could you do it in the morning before your partner leaves? Or let LO watch TV or something for 10 minutes?

There is a lot that's inaccessible such as I can't easily fill/empty the dishwasher with him awake as he tries to climb in, or takes knives/breakable things out - so tend to pile stuff up on top of it and DH does empty/fill when he gets home.

In general though for other jobs I just do them and he plays on the floor nearby.

Is he getting enough attention and exercise? Mine go a bit loopy if I don't walk them and make sure they have busy work - a bit like dogs.

I do my make up in the dining room mirror whilst DS has breakfast in his high chair - needs must!

All personal care happens before DS gets up or in the evening when he’s in bed. He’s much better now at 3, but he was equally as destructive interested in exploring and screaming in the playpen at 1.5 and I found it too stressful.

I have a 22 month old and a 6 month old. Having a shower in the morning and putting make up on makes a big difference to how I feel, same as you. I also have to be out of the house by 8.30am every day to take my eldest to school. So what I do is set my alarm for 6am so I can shower in peace before they wake up, then do my makeup & hair in the kitchen while they're contained in their high chairs having breakfast. 20 mins of YouTube helps!

I feel ya! I have a 17 month old who is the same. My partner leaves at 5.30am so have to do mornings alone and I work full time so need make up 😆 I just live with the chaos and mess tbh, because I see no other way. I am hoping it's not too much longer before she will sit and play and not try and get into danger!!

I've accepted looking much less "put together" than I would like! Shower at night, clothes out the night before, hair up, no make up/make up thrown at face in the car before I get to the office.

I also no longer wear anything that requires ironing or dry cleaning

I'm planning on some kind of resurgence in 5 to 10 years - if I can be arsed.

It wouldn't work with mine (16 months) because he'd come looking for me if I went upstairs to shower but it might with your home layout - TV? It might keep him occupied for 15 minutes whilst you get ready? When I need to cook I do this!

Thanks for all the replies - so nice to know im not alone with this! My first child was remarkably chilled and easy so this one has been a bit of a shock to the system!

Forgot to mention he gets up at 5am regularly 🥹 so no chance of getting up before him. I have now resulted to 20mins of youtube in the morning so I can get ready, its working so far.

I shower in the evening so in the morning that's one thing fewer to worry about.

Morning make up - I sit her in her cot then apply my make up right next to her and talk to her while I do it so she doesn't scream / cry (she's a similar age and temperament to your child). She has toys in there and I sometimes give her make up items that she can't remove the lids from and this seems to fascinate her!

Mine is exactly the same.

I have to shower before bed, which I hate, but it's the only way to wash my hair.

In the morning I try and get dressed while he's eating his breakfast in the highchair, luckily it's a bungalow so I can just push the chair around with me. It doesn't always work though as sometimes he needs quite a bit of cajoling to eat.

I wish I could get up before him but he's an early riser and my husband already gets up at 5 to get ready for work so there's no time or bathroom availability!

I actually find this one of the most stressful things about being a Mum, it just makes me feel like a nobody when all I can manage is to brush my teeth and splash my face in the morning.

When you bath or shower in the mornings take him in with you, mine loves it.
Also you say he can unlock the door, put a lock up higher so he can’t reach