Need help

[Buzzbee63]

I can’t do it anymore, I’m completely at breaking point. My 9 month old has always been a high needs baby, doesn’t sleep, always struggled with feeding, has cmpa etc. I am unable to put him down for a few minutes to do something as he screams. I have no family to help. My husband works long hours and occasionally works away. My ds started nursery a few weeks ago and refuses to eat or drink and just cries. He comes home and projectile vomits everywhere as he’s so dehydrated. Today I managed to go in at lunchtime to feed and we had no vomiting but he’s screamed since he’s come home and won’t go to anyone else apart from me. I’m so tired, I feel like I’ve failed in all areas, he doesn’t sleep/eat/play/develop at the ‘right’ rate. I honestly don’t know how much longer I can go on. Not sure what the point of this post is, just need help!

Please make an emergency GP appointment tomorrow. You need and deserve proper help and support. I don't think your baby should be struggling this much.

Sending you lots of hugs. I hear you, my first was high needs. I found a sling helped a bit but it was such hard work. It did eventually pass but it must be so hard for you not having family around to help. You aren't failing, it's not your fault or because of anything you've done. Some babies are just born this way x

Im so sorry to read this OP, it must be incredibly tough. Please don’t tell yourself you’ve failed as you absolutely haven’t!

I came to say the same as @Pooterlie, I would seek medical help too. Are your health visitors any good? Has baby always been this way or have things got worse recently/since starting nursery?

My son has always been quite high needs too, I often wonder if teething plays a big part in it, you could try giving him
medicine to see if that helps. It also sounds like he’s got separation anxiety from starting nursery, this should stop within a few weeks with any luck. My little boy was very similar (I’d get called to collect him as he was so inconsolable!) but honestly now at 16 months he’s so much easier to handle.

In the meantime can your husband help give you a break over the weekend or take some time off next week?

Sending lots of strength your way 🙏 you’re not alone! X

In the short term you need to explain to your husband that you are in crisis and he needs to take some time off to support you.