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Original poster

how do i tell my 4 yr old dd......

10 replies

lulu2 · 20/02/2008 16:46

that her auntie who has lived with us for 3 1/2 years is moving into her own flat?

My dd is very close to my sister who lives with us and who has downs syndrome and she is moving out next week to live independently. I just don't know what to do for the best, as i know my dd is going to be upset by the change.
Should i wait and tell dd say the day before we start moving furniture or do it sooner so she has time to get used to the idea?

any advise welcome.

OP posts:
LadybirdG · 20/02/2008 16:48

how does she usually react to new things? Does she like time to digest it, or is it better to act quickly?

Will telling her the day before be too much of a shock?

For my children, I think I'd tell a couple of weeks before in an excited "ooh Auntie is getting a new home how exciting, we'll be able to visit lots for cake and play etc"

Saturn74 · 20/02/2008 16:49

Maybe make it into a big adventure, and get your DD to help.
Be really upbeat about the whole thing, and tell her she'll be able to visit her aunty lots.

HuwEdwards · 20/02/2008 16:51

Agree with Humphrey, be positive; let her choose a moving in gift for your DS.

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orangehead · 20/02/2008 16:52

I not really to sure, but I would prob try and make it sound exciting that she has a new house that you can all go and visit and perhaps talk about certain games you can play thier with her aunt or something exciting to do there. Reassure her that she can still see her loads. Perhaps get her excited about chosing the perfect house warming gift

PrettyCandles · 20/02/2008 16:53

It's a bit like telling her you're going to have a baby. Not too soon and not too late - giving her time to understand and question it, but not forget it.

I would start discussing it in a general sort of way right now, about how people move houses, and go to visit each other and so on. So that, when you tell her about her auntie the concept will not be alien to her. Maybe get her to help pack a little, or to draw a picture specially for auntie to put on her wall.

BettySpaghetti · 20/02/2008 16:54

I would give her plenty of notice and, like the others have said, make it sound exciting and fun.

Also, why not get your DD to to do some pictures "for Aunties new house"

mezzer · 20/02/2008 17:05

I agree with other posters. I'd think it would be too much of a shock to do it all at once. And, a great idea to have her make pictures and buy a gift for the new house. Will you be shopping for new things for her house? Maybe your dd can help pick things out?

Original poster
lulu2 · 20/02/2008 18:13

thanks for all suggestions. My dd ponders on things and asks lots of questions if she is not sure about things so i suppose i should tell her sooner but i don't want her to worry.
great idea about drawing pictures and i like ideas of buying my sister a house warming gift which dd can pick - she'll probably end up with something pink.

OP posts:
Original poster
lulu2 · 21/02/2008 09:17

i told dd last night and she was fine, asked lots of questions and then told her auntie she loved her.
I said it is very exciting news and dd said but mummy, i am not excited, who will play hide and seek with me?

OP posts:
LadybirdG · 21/02/2008 10:21

Glad she was fine

Looks like you're going to playing lots of hide and seek soon!

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