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Is it ok to let them quit?

29 replies

loverofbono · 26/05/2023 22:30

Just wanting some opinions on here. Recently my friend told me that her daughter really wanted to start ballet. She wouldn't allow her because she said she knew eventually she would have to quit, and she 'isn't raising quitters.' It made me think, as my kids have dipped their toes into everything over the years, football, drama, ballet, gymnastics, tennis, you name it basically. Once they realise it's not for them we move onto something else. Is this bad for kids, does it teach them a bad example? As in, not reaching them to stick at something regardless of whether they like it/are good at it?

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AWhaleSwamBy · 27/05/2023 00:39

@UsingChangeofName I think there is a BIG difference between finding something isn't for you, and leaving at the end of term, or the end of the season, or the end of the block booking, and people who allow their dc to just 'not turn up' to something because they don't feel like it on night / one weekend.

Exactly. There is a difference between being flakey and realizing something is not for you.

HereForTheFreeLunch · 27/05/2023 00:42

What rubbish! If her kid really wanted to do ballet she should have let her (assuming the money and time are there.)

She is hardly going to try it when older so that's one experience that she could have had but will never have in her life.

Dinosauratemydaffodils · 27/05/2023 00:46

My dd started ballet classes two years ago just before she turned 3. It's helped her core and her posture. She's made friends at class as well so even if she quit tomorrow she's benefitted in multiple ways.

We let our kids try anything they want on the understanding that they're signing up for a term if they go beyond the trial session. Unfortunately dc1 hasn't met an extra curricular activity he doesn't like which brings a whole other set of issues but saying no on the basis it's not something they'll do forever seems strange.

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MintJulia · 27/05/2023 00:55

I'm not bothered about whether ds will ever be competition standard at anything.

I push him to continue if he enjoys something and it's generally beneficial. That means nagging him off the computer to get changed and go to a class. He has a black belt in karate and is grade 7 in the pool as a result. But mostly, it means he has confidence and a basic network of friends.

It's the difference between teenage laziness but enjoys it when he gets there, and not enjoying something at all.

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