Getting DD dressed - sensory issues?

[owmn]

Hi,

Currently in the midst of awful battles to get my 4yo dressed every day; the last two days of getting ready for pre-school have resulted in tears all round and leaving an hour late.

Not really sure what I’m looking for - tips, solidarity - but it’s become nigh on impossible within the last few weeks to get her dressed and ready, regardless of the reason and whether it’s something she’s looking forward to or not (just as likely to happen before swimming as before school).

There’s a lot of stalling and encouragement required to get moving, and as soon as it comes to clothes she has an absolute meltdown. Everything is uncomfortable, including old clothes/underwear that has at one time or another been fine, right from underwear, tops, leggings, but with the biggie being socks and shoes. The main issue seems to be the length of sleeves, seams, and the heel and toe of her socks.

The socks specifically seem to really bother her and I remember being the same as a child, but it’s reached the point now where we have 30 minutes of hysterical crying/kicking/hitting over having to put them on. We let her do it and they get taken off immediately as she becomes immediately overwhelmed with how uncomfortable the feel, and put back on endlessly. We do it and she feels we haven’t done it right so the same happens.

This morning she was virtually inconsolable for nearly an hour just trying to put her socks and shoes on (several days PP over here as well so I wasn’t far behind her!).

It’s distressing for us all now, and we obviously don’t want to overrule her when she’s telling us she’s uncomfortable, but aside from leave her naked and never leave the house, we’re a little at a loss as to what to do!

Seem-less socks worked wonders for us at that age. As did pants with no frills around the edges. We still have the frill free pants and cut labels out of clothes now there are much older..
I remember crying on the hall floor with the baby in a car seat whilst my then 3yo spent 45 mins in a meltdown about socks and shoes. Think we went out with just wellies no socks in the end.

Sockshop do the best seamless socks I've found OP. My DD was the same about socks at 4, now she's 7 she's fine with them.

Sorry you and your dd are having a tough time.

One option with socks is to stop making her wear socks. My dd wears crocs without socks to nursery.

Does she have to wear socks? With the warm weather, she's probably fine wearing sandals?

Does several days PP mean that you have just had a baby? It's totally normal for the older sibling to go totally, totally nuts when a new baby is born and it does settle down if you give them time and patience.

This is not my wheelhouse, but could it be a size/trapped issue? My 4yo VASTLY prefers oversized socks with sandals, crocks or wellies at least 1 size too big. No idea what's wrong with normal shoes. And his tops and jumpers are ages 6-8, otherwise he feels restricted and panics... He is tall and skinny so it's not a genuine size issue where things are too small. Trainer socks have been big winners here.

Sounds sensory,very common, could or could nit indicate asd ut at that age could equally be absolutely nothing. Do seamless or no socks, do bigger sized/ loose everything- dresses are easiest. Cut labels out- if need be put plasters on the bits cut off/ seams of clothes. Ask preschool for sticker charts/ symbols and tape one piece of clothing at a time- underwear - rewarding activity, dress rewarding activity, sandakes rewarding activity and hand any extra clothes to preschool if needed.

What's sge like with suncream? Hair brush? Pjs?

Thanks so much for all the replies!

We do try and pick our battles and let her wear what she wants when we can, but her setting and activities at school make open toe sandals at all times difficult, though she does wear them a lot otherwise.

@Pooterlie I was about to place an order elsewhere but will take a look at theirs, thank you!

@BertieBotts I have indeed! And though we were seeing this before baby arrived, we do seem to have had a bit of an increase since, which we totally get, it’s a big change for all of us! That’s one of the reasons I’m so keen to try and find some things that work for her. Now have some sparkly crocs and frozen charms on the way that I’m hoping will go down a treat!

We’re struggling to work out what’s best clothes wise, i.e sometimes oversized and loose is best (she likes dresses and big jumpers) but others will lose it if there’s a loose seam against her leg or a bit of fabric that moves/doesn’t sit in what she feels is quite the right place and then doesn’t move. I guess it’s going to be a little more trial and error so I really appreciate all the tips!

@Mynameisntrelevant1 suncream, hair, and pjs all have their difficulties too but much less often and never to the same intensity.

For us, inside out sock shop seam free socks and sparkly crocs sorted it all out and then she grew out of the sensitivity. For my DD starting school was mega so I think big stressful change was part of the problem.