Talking to ex about DC sugar intake

[SpringSpringTime]

I’m debating having a conversation with my ex/coparent about DC’s sugar intake. We’ve had a very harmonious split, been separated 2ish years, he has a new partner, the dust has all settled. We don’t criticise each other, have good boundaries, and are in the same page with most parenting choices.

However! He brings sweets to every school pickup, and I knoow he gives them out after sporting activities too. I’m no purist-we have treats like ice cream on days out as part of a varied diet-but I really think children shouldn’t routinely be given sweets. It establishes an eating pattern that is detrimental to health in the long term, and the short! Is this something I should raise, and if so how can I do it in a proportionate way, given that this is broadly speaking a very good parent I’m talking to?

Say you're concerned about their teeth?

You clearly have respect for your ex and overall think he's a great parent. I think you should say pretty much what you've said above - thank him for working so well to co-parent together and ask to have a conversation about sugar so that you can parent similarly in this area too. Don't try to tell him what to do as he is equally her parent.

Take them to the dentist and feedback to him re sugar at pick ups. I don’t understand why parents take snacks to pick up anyway unless they live 4 hours from the school.

Tell him the dentist has advised a reduced sugar intake.

Me neither! I live round the corner so don’t take anything, but DC always complain because ‘daddy brings sweets’🙄

I have a similar issue, not with a co-parent but with another parent. They bring every day stuff like sweets, chocolate, donuts, ice creams, lollies, cupcakes, biscuits or whether else to their daughter, who then shares with all
her friends. My kids can normally have the occasional ice cream and cupcake etc but not on an everyday basis. The parents never ask me whether they can give my child this stuff. The child gives it straight to my child and so if I intervene the damage is already done as my child is then upset if I take the stuff away. What should I do?

What about trying to make sure he does the next few dentist appointments? The co-parenting relationship is so important, you want to tread carefully. There will be things you do that he won't agree with either.