Need advice/a rant about 5 year old

[SophieB0012]

I have the most wonderful 5 year old DD and nearly 3 year old DS. They’re both funny, loving and I love watching them grow together as such good friends (most of the time).

Now I’m actually writing it down it feels like such a non problem but I just need to get out some frustration. My DD is always what I call “on”. Constant talking, constant questions, constantly needed things one after the other, always wants me to play something and struggles to take no for an answer even if I explain the reasons I can’t. And when I say constant I mean seriously constant. From the moment she wakes up until bedtime. No matter where I am or what I’m doing all I hear is “mummy” with maybe a minute in between each request. I’m finding it so hard at the moment to deal with as well as dealing with DS who is in his terrible two stage. She goes to school now and I think it’s even worse when she has been to school - the evenings are almost unbearable. I give her as much attention as I possibly can and try to set boundaries as well so she knows I’m not always going to be immediately available. I know it is just her personality as she’s always been like it but it seems to have ramped up to the maximum recently. I’m a very introverted person so I often need times where I just decompress quietly and I’ve lost that - especially in the evenings which then means I’m grumpy and I don’t want to be a grumpy mum. I’m starting to feel panicky and claustrophobic in my own house because I just can’t get away from the requests and the “mummy”s and I feel so guilty and so confused and I just don’t know what to do!

DH tries to help but I’ve always been the go to for both of them as he works a lot and he’s recently started a business and really needs his attention to be on that as it’s very much a 24/7 kind of thing. Just someone tell me it gets easier with extroverted children?! Please!

I’m starting to wonder whether I just should try and have some counselling to help deal with it all. I have plenty of breaks from the kids as DS goes to nursery 3 days a week so I don’t know why I’m finding it so hard.

Maybe you're building up an anxiety towards it so that even when your relaxed you're thinking about it which is inevitably going to make it worse. Counselling can help or have you tried relaxation techniques (I found yoga helps me clear my mind a bit). I think it's probably a phase that will get better, being at school as well means shes just excited to share time with you as there is now less. Have you tried organising a play date or an after school club (I know it's hard when you're introverted and with another child to take care of). Does she like puzzles/games or imaginative play (small world) maybe set her half an hour each evening with an activity that she likes but it has to be an independent activity that she tries on her own.
Have you got any other family that could maybe visit just to give you a break? Are you able to get out for a walk, if you're feeling claustrophobic maybe a change of scenery could help (I get a bit cabin feverish at the moment being stuck in with a newborn baby and just taking her for a walk makes me feel better)