Health anxiety around children

[Anxiousworriedmum]

Hi i’m not sure which subject to put this in to be honest!

Hope this one is ok!

I was wondering if anyone could offer any pearls of wisdom or advice?
I’ve suffered badly from health anxiety (surrounding my children and others) and OCD since the birth of my daughter 8 years ago. For most of the time i’ve been on sertraline 100mg and tend to reach for it when I go down a hole.
I’m pregnant with my 3rd child (17+4 ) and this is the longest stretch i’ve had of not being on medication (about 8 months).

I’ve wanted to go this whole pregnancy not medicated as i’ve since read about side effects for baby. However, I’m struggling so bad. All my anxieties over my children are coming back. I worry myself sick over anything they have like rashes, spots around their lips, nappy rash, sore willies. Then I worry about things I can’t see like blood borne diseases anything bad.

I keep looking forward to bedtime so that I can switch my mind off and not have the worry. Except last night I dreamt I caught hepatitis B. So it’s now following me in my dreams!! I then often wake up around 3am and can’t go back to sleep because my mind is racing.

I’m seriously contemplating going back on medication but feel like i’m letting my baby and myself down by giving in. I have a paid for therapist appointment this week in the hope it will help, but I feel so engulfed and bogged down by all of this that i’m not sure if i’ve left it to late in that respect.

Has anyone been in this predicament or suffered from similar issues?
x

Hi OP,

I don’t have any advice really but wanted you to know you’re not alone in feeling like this. My health anxiety started long before I had my baby in my late teens (I’m now mid 30s) and centred around myself and my mum and husband. I did have 18 months of CBT for it in 2021/22, then had a mmc before falling pregnant again with my now 10 week old baby. I let the anxiety ruin my pregnancy and had so much regret for that happening. Now with a baby the spiralling thoughts are happening again, I just don’t have time for them to be about me anymore and they’re about my baby, I’m obsessed with making sure he’s breathing, consistency and colour of poo, rashes, the amount he drinks, plus anything that could be going on inside that j don’t know about (terrified of childhood cancer etc).

I have now been referred to the peri natal mental health team for some extra support, could you speak to your midwife and ask for a referral?

I really wish I had sought help during pregnancy, so please don’t feel like it’s giving in at all. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with medication if it helps you and your baby.

Sending love to you, health anxiety is absolutely awful ♥️