Stroppy toddler!!

[Wingingitmama92]

I feel like I have the world worse stroppy toddler! He is almost 20 months old.
some days are so bad I just want to sit down and cry.
There is just no reasoning with him. He understands so much but I will can’t work out how to make hun understand a compromise.
I’m a single parent to him which makes it feel so much worse.
Taking him out for a simple lunch is just such hard work.
he isn’t in childcare yet (he starts in January) but that even feels me with dread as I feel like he’s going to be that child everyone dreads coming in.
He still has 2.5/3 hour naps a day and sleeps all through the night.
please does anyone have any tips or reassurance it’s just a phase!
I have family around me to help but I sometimes feel like they don’t even know enjoy having him…

some days I’m at my wits end.
Thankyou

You can't reason or compromise with a 20 month old! It's impossible. Just pick your battles.

If going out for lunch is a nightmare, don't do it. Just take 6 months off and try again down the line. In the meantime, find something that does work like a nice takeaway for when he's asleep.

What does he like to do?

I know people talk about the terrible twos, but honestly OP I found this the hardest age of all (and I have three teenagers!). It's just impossible to reason with them. Things will get better when he starts understanding "if this happens, then this".

OH my eldest dining out was a nightmare. We just had picnic in park, on the beach. Saved money too.

I laugh whenever he moans about his two boys who are much calmer than he ever was.

@NuffSaidSam he loves being outside, playing in mud etc it’s a proper boy. Which we do all the time. My family own a farm and he loves being up there. I just dread days out sometimes. Even doing my weekly shop can be hell.

@justasking111 Thankyou! I would take a newborn any day over a toddler at this age 😂 I am hoping when he can talk thing will be easier.

Could you get your shop delivered?

The thing with toddlers this age is they won't change their behaviour to suit your schedule. You have to change what you do to suit them or put up with the nightmare.

Wherever possible, make life easy for yourself. If he likes being outside do that as much as possible. Invest in a great picnic rug/nice picnic set/flask etc, whatever will make it more pleasant for you and just go with what he wants.

I have one the same age and you've got to manage it so it works for you both.

• no lunches out
• a morning and afternoon trip out, park, toddler class, library, shops, something stimulating and where you can wear them out
• home for nap at lunch so you can eat/rest/catch up on housework

It gets easier I promise, but this is a difficult age and you need to accept that, otherwise you'll be miserable. Do you get any free childcare hours?

@DucksNewburyport oh I’m praying things will be easier when he talks, I always get comments like “mine were never like that”
it’s the hardest age so far I think, and he’s my only one. I’m either crying because of his rages or crying because of mum guilt…. Parenting isn’t for the faint hearted 🤣

@Nightmanagerfan
i feel like I do nail all those on the head, I don’t like being in all day so we always go to soft plays, parks etc… he has 3 hours naps daily and sleeps through the night.
It’s the only time I can get anything done when he’s napping.
I don’t get any free childcare unfortunately. I am a single mum but I work and have savings so I’m entitled to nothing. He is starting preschool in January tho as he’s 2 in September

Also, don't worry about starting childcare, they'll have seen it all before and they've only got to look after the kids not try and do their shop etc. with him in tow. He'll be fine given the freedom to do what he wants.