Sleep problems, will it be like this for another year?

[Firsttimemum1203]

My 14 month old has never slept through the night. Not even close.
He wakes multiple times and needs to be breastfed to fall back asleep (although he does not fall asleep at bedtime whilst breastfeeding so not sure why he needs it when he wakes?)
I appreciate this may be part of why his sleep is like this, but the bigger problem I have is the fact that we still share a room and bed.
I became a single mum unexpectedly when he was 3 months old and all I could afford at the time was a 1 bed.
I haven’t been able to find somewhere in time and tbh I naively thought if I extended my contract it would be rolling and I could leave with a months notice. I’ve recently found out this is not the case and I am now locked in till next May. He will be 2 years and 2 months by then 😩.
Does this mean I am doomed till then?

Every child is different and there is nothing wrong with what yorue doing. You have the added stress of being a single mum so please don’t be too harsh on yourself. I started slowly refusing the breastfeeds. Just taking longer to do it, settling with other ways. It was a very slow process but in time the less he breastfed, the less he woke for milk. He still wants to be near me but doesn’t breastfeed anymore so it helps a lot with sleep.

I think I started doing this when he was 2.

Also personally unless you want to sleep train (which does not work with all babies) he will be getting into your bed when he knows he’s alone, no matter where you put him to start with 😂 it won’t be forever.

They're all different and will sleep through at different points.
Mine was 2y1m when we had our first full night, I think my milk dried up due to pregnancy around then though. My niece was 8weeks old when she started sleeping through.

Roll with it. Must be so hard as a single parent. You're doing a great job!

Could you create a sleep space for yourself on a sofa bed in the living area maybe in the meantime, if you no longer want to co-sleep? Would something like that be an option?

He wakes and thinks 'i have a boob in my mouth in this situation!' then complains until he gets one.

Can you sleep in your living room temporarily and break the cycle? Set yourself times for breastfeed so eg say he feeds five times a night now, aim to only feed at 11 and 3 eg - outside those times you'll soothe, offer water, sing a song etc but not bf. Stick it out, you will be knackered but you need to see it through.

He'll start to wake and think 'I cuddle mum in this situation!' or ideally will just go I'm in bed, I'll go back to sleep'

Then reduce to one feed, then none. Then you can return to the room to sleep.

Wearing a tightly buttoned cardigan etc so your boobs are inaccessible can help.

Thanks everyone. I think the idea of me sleeping in living room for a bit might help, and I’ve recently ordered a sofa bed so that could acc work.
I feel so conflicted about stopping breastfeeding, part of me wants to continue because I know that’s what he naturally wants & finds comforting but the other part of me finds it so exhausting sometimes I wish I never started!

You can carry on breastfeeding in the day but night wean if you want to. I've done that recently and it worked really well.