Weaning stress

[whyyy321]

Wondered if anyone can explain/advise/something! LO is 8 months (more like 7.5 corrected) and we've been trying weaning since about 6 months. It feels like he's not eating anything! He won't take a spoonful from us (but will try and spoon to own mouth, tho barely anything actually gets in haha). He'll happily suck away on BLW type foods (toast fingers, boiled carrot fingers, those melty puff things etc etc) but again I've no idea if anything is being actually eaten??

The HV said he should be on 600ml formula max by now but he's still on the amount he had pre weaning. It's beginning to really stress me out especially when I see/hear of other babies who "wolf down" three meals a day at this age! Can anyone tell me their experience of this? He must be ingesting something as I see evidence in nappies but it looks like it's just all on the floor/the baby and he's still having so much milk!

My daughter is the same. She is not interested in any type of savoury pouch. And will just suck a few bits of veg when I give her anything. I’m assuming that as she gets older and more used to food she will eat more.

If he is 7.5 months corrected then I would chill. He is clearly eating. I wouldn’t expect him to having less milk yet.

Very normal. Lots don't show interest in food until about 12 months. Certainly no need to be on 3 meals a day at that age. Relax and let your baby take the lead with how much they want to eat.

Keep going with the blw, it sounds like he really enjoys it. He's only been trying for a couple of months and he'll naturally start eating more. Give him bits off your plate too. He's having fun with food and this is a good thing. Obviously, if he doesn't increase the amount he eats over the next few months, then discuss it with your health visitor. Otherwise, just keep going and don't stress.

Oh and I wouldn't reduce milk at that stage either. It's very young still!!

My daughter was exactly like this - quite liked the baby led weaning, hated being spoon fed, tried lots, played lots with food but didn’t actually eat much - until she started nursery at 11 months. I think she liked copying the older kids. Anyway now she’s 14 months, completely weaned off milk and she absolutely stuffs her little face at every possible opportunity.

We haven’t seen our HV since DD was maybe 4 months so I was unaware of these guidlines… I have no idea how much milk she was on at 8 months but she definitely wasn’t eating any full meals. Also, I have an acquaintance whose a paediatric speech therapist and she says “food before 1, is just for fun” so I just kept offering her food and decided not to stress about it.

'Food before one is just for fun'. You are doing great with the blw. Keep up the milk it's their main source of nutrition until they are 1 xx

I don't think ours ate much before 10 months. At 18 months they eat loads so don't worry.

DS was like this. Absolutely point blank refused to be spoon fed. Only wanted to feed himself. The vast majority ended up in his hair/on the floor/down his front. What ended up in his mouth was often spat out. He was still breastfeeding ++. I was in despair!

We kept persevering and offering him a variety of things at regular times of the day. Eventually, sometime between 10-12 months it just clicked. He’s been a great eater since. I’ve got videos of him self feeding a whole plate of gnocchi using cutlery at 14 months, which I wouldn’t have believed at 8 month! Don’t give up and don’t worry too much about reducing formula at this stage either, it’s still so early!

Ohhh thank you everyone! This is so reasurring! We'd gone in to weaning with food for fun before one in mind but the HV really threw me. He's never been the best sleeper so it just felt like I'd failed at this too, but I feel so much better hearing that some just take a bit longer to get it. We will keep trying the BLW, when he is in to it he does a great job of getting it in his mouth. Ah thank you so much :)

Your HV saying that seems a bit mean!

I think at 7.5 months your baby is doing great (as are you!) my second baby is like yours and still really loves her milk so I’ve just kept giving her the same amount more or less.

Practical advice: the only real nutrient that starts to deplete at this age is Iron so maybe try and get some iron rich foods offered. Also try to space out milk feeds and offering food. Otherwise just keep doing what you’re doing and try not to stress out.

Ahh all so reassuring. He will start nursery in a few months and I did wonder if that'd help so interesting to hear it has for some! Hoping it also helps with sleep but that's another story haha.

Don't stress, weaning is such a slow process. Just keeping putting things in front of him so he can explore.
Also please don't feel like a failure over sleep or weaning. Every baby is different and I'm sure you're doing a great job.

One other good thing to remember is that babies don't read the books that say what they should and shouldn't be doing at their age. They make their own decisions. 😉

Don't forget, weaning is about learning to eat solid food. Not just Ingesting food!

Even if he sucking or gnawing on things, he's learning about the boundaries of his mouth and building his tongue strength to move food around and chew etc.

Even just playing with food at that age is considered a good thing.

If you need reassurance I cannot recommend Solid Starts enough. Free app, loads of info on their website and great content on Instagram too.

Please ignore what the HV says and what any other baby is doing. All that matters is what YOUR baby is doing. Doesn’t matter how much other babies are eating or not eating

there is SO much more to weaning than eating the food. It’s exploring food, smelling it, squashing it, touching it, playing with it, sucking it. I think you run the risk of future problems by considering this an issue.

your job is to provide food and your babies job is to decide how much they want to eat and whether they like it. They are no different to adults. If they’re still hungry for a bottle then just give them a bottle. Don’t over complicate things

I wouldn't worry at that age. It's great that the bring finger food to their mouths.

One of mine barely ate a thing till ten months and is my least fussy eater now; she eats most things and grows well. Her younger sister who ate right away at 6 months is incredibly fussy and tiny for her her age.

Hhm so I'm back again as things are still painful with weaning! He's now about 9months corrected. He'll happily have a good go at porridge for breakfast (it's a little sweet) and will always demolish fruits. He'll have a bit of finger food at lunch- cucumber and maybe some home made bits and pieces like egg & spinach muffins (maybe an amount about half the size of a regular muffin tin round shape if you see what I mean). He doesn't always swallow loads but is happy to chew away. He will eat 1/3 to 1/2 of a few pouches (more if sweet - demolishes the porridge breakfast Ella ones) like daal or falafal types. But dinner is awful, he rarely eats more than a mouthful and often just refuses, crying and fussing in the highchair. I gave him a mild chickpea curry this Eve which he just refused from the spoon so i just experimented and put a bit on toast which he was happy to suck off but didn't really eat the toast.

I'm getting quite stressed now and I think it also impacts his sleep as he wakes 3 hours after bed hungry for milk. I don't know if that's an ok amount or if I should expect more? He only has one tooth erupting now, so could that affect things? Im also worrying if this suggests something developmental about him? He's hitting all other milestones.

Just getting very stressed, main source of tension over here and we've got snippy with each other over it this evening (me and DH obviously not me and baby!)

I should add, he's dropped his milk by 1/3 or so, sometimes more, and his poos have changed to more adult like so he is eating. He's very active crawling and pulling to stand and I think hasnt lost weight but isn't as round in the tummy as others in my NCT group

He sounds fine. Everything he's eating is normal - he's experimenting with textures & taking bits in. That's good progress. It's normal at his age to still have milk in the night.
Lower your expectations - weaning takes a long time and they're not on full meals until a year+

My DD was the same OP, and whilst I'd read all the stuff online saying it's normal I'd still worry. Now I just think I wasted so much energy worrying!

I genuinely don't think my daughter got the concept of food til 9.5 months, and after that it wasn't huge amounts. It only really became proper meals when I started day-weaning at about a year. She still kept up her growth lines throughout. Solid Starts is great and evidenced based and often has q&as on their insta.