8 month old starting nursery in a month and REFUSES milk from anything besides boob

[blueflame1]

Hello

As the title says, my nearly 8 month old will only have milk from the tap.

She won't take it from a bottle or a cup. We have tried every way of giving a bottle possible, three different brand teats, freshly expressed milk each time, but she just refuses. Even from an open cup she won't take it. She'll happily sip water, but not milk.

I knew I was returning to work around this time even before she was born and the plan was to introduce a bottle from birth so we wouldn't have this problem.

However, she didn't latch as well as my first child, so I was worried that she would prefer the bottle and refuse the breast. I followed all the NHS and HV advice to wait till 6 weeks after breastfeeding has been established to introduce a bottle. Lo and behold, she refused entirely.

I'm honestly so stressed out about how she's going to cope with other caregivers. She's on solids now, but it's obvious she isn't satisfied after meals even though she eats well. She just moans and cries instead of happily playing like she does after a breastfeed.

I have my first KIT day next week (ill be away around 5 hours), so we've been offering her solids and milk from cup/bottle only, but she still won't take it. It's been just over 4 hours that I haven't given her breast and I feel so guilty because she hasn't been her usual happy self.

When I go back to work she'll be approaching 9 months and I'll be away from her 7.30-4ish. Will she be ok without milk for that long? I'm so so so worried.

I really wish I could afford to stay home until she turns 1 but we simply cannot afford it.

My breastfed girl was similar - milk does not come from a bottle or cup! She started nursery 4 days 7.30-5 at 7 months and despite me sending pumped milk for months, she never accepted it. Her weight has remained on her percentile since birth (just over 50th), but she was already a very good eater before starting. For the first few months she really loaded up on milk from pick up (in the carrier) until about 9pm, and then overnight too.

She's 15 months now and still only has milk from me... She's a very cheerful baby (my first wasn't...) and developing exactly on track. She loves her nursery ladies too.

Good luck!

She'll be fine, either she'll take it from someone different in a completely different scenario to being at home as she doesn't link nursery with milk or you or you'll be shattered as she'll make up for it when you get home.

She'll be fine. My ebf baby did without me 4 days a week and refused bottles and cups. Same age, 9 months. Took water only at nursery and made up for it on evenings and weekends!

I agree with pps she will be fine. I don't see the need for a bottle at eight months really. She will drink milk or water from a cup, eat her meals and copy the other DC in nursery then feed from you morning and night.She won't have you there to remind her of the comfort of a breast feed.

She'll be fine with solids and water from a cup. Don't worry.

Bit different, my first was bottle fed, but would only take a bottle from me or DH. This meant no milk during the day when she started nursery at nine months, despite the best efforts of the staff. She was fine though as she was a good eater. My second only has 3-4 Oz in the daytime too at the same age.

Another one to say the same happened with us!
DD made up for it at night (sorry!).

My DC were the same age and were exactly the same with refusing milk (expressed breast milk or formula) from a bottle or cup. They managed fine without milk when I was at work and just had a big feed when I got home. One of the DCs eventually took cow's milk at around 9 months (a bit controversial but they were still mainly drinking breastmilk as a milk source until 15 months so personally I felt this was fine for them to have a small cup of it once or twice a day on my working days). At weekends they all fed more often during the day and my boobs coped with the difference in milk between different days just fine.

Phew!

Thanks all for your reassurances!

I don't mind that she'll make up for it overnight, we cosleep anyway so I'm used to it lol!

Both of mine were the same and I went back to work fully after 8 months.. by then they would have a huge feed on a morning, happily eat 3 meals plus snacks then feed away once I picked them up, they had a bedtime feed and sometimes fed through the night as well.

Baby will be fine, if you can express and add your milk to porridge for breakfast or to mashed veggies etc.

Oh that's a good idea!

Yeah I'm sure a little amount in the day is fine, it's hardly replacing entire feeds.

Mine started at 8 months and wouldn't take a bottle either. I provided a cup and hoped for the best. The first two weeks she just sipped at the cup but one day she suddenly started drinking it all.

At 9 months, if they really won't have any milk at nursery you can bf in the morning, when you pick them up and at bedtime.

DS wouldn't ever go near a bottle, but did eventually take formula from a cup, maybe because the smell was different. I returned to work when he was 11 months, it was fine.

She will be ok, provided she's eating well and drinking lots of water. It's worth persevering with the bottle/cup whilst you're at work as it'll be a completely different environment where she'll learn you're not there so that's the only way she'll get milk. And feed her just before leaving and as soon as you're back and she'll get enough milk during that time.

@gentlemum I tried formula from a cup today. She took 2 good sips and refused any more. She was definitely hungry as it had been 4 hours since her last breastfeed and an hour or so after lunch. It could be different if someone else offered I suppose.

@Neurodiversitydoctor are you a neurologist by any chance?

Unfortunately she's probably never going to want to take formula in a cup from you, why would she when from you she can get breastmilk which to her will taste better and more familiar plus the comfort of a feed. It really has to be done by someone else and probably when you're not even in the house otherwise she'll only want you and breastfeeding.

I had the same thing at the same age. DS just reverse cycled. The sleep deprivation and chest discomfort at work was something else but we got through it. Good luck.

Not exactly I have some neurology training but not an expert in epilepsy, much more about ASC/ DCD and cerebral palsy.

My DD would only take milk from a sippy cup if I was not around. Any sniff of me and she wanted the breast. I went back to work on phased hours when she was 6m old and it went okay.

You might have tried this already but my DD refused milk in a bottle until I tried giving it to him really warm.

Can a stroke affect baby's ability to drink from a straw?

DD feeds perfectly from breast, she takes sips from a cup, but hasn't really grasped a straw. Everywhere I've read, babies get the hang of it really quickly. I've tried all the usual tricks, but nothing seems to work.

She hasn't been diagnosed with CP or hemiplegia just yet, but it's very early days, so it's difficult to tell how her stroke will affect her.

I haven't tried this to be honest!

Next time we try I might leave the house and get DH to do it.

She’ll be fine. I went back to work at the same point, I pumped and sent in bottles for a couple of months but wish I hadn’t bothered as she never drank it. She was fine with solids and a cup.

if you have a look at kellymom and “reverse cycling” it’s actually a thing in the US. As their mat leaves are so short bf babies learn to reverse the night and day pattern for feeding, and feed evening/night/morning rather than in the day. Mine did pick up an extra night feed when she went to nursery, so I guess we kind of fell into a similar pattern.

We co sleep too. Have you mastered side lying while asleep yet? Invaluable when back at work :) Baby girl helps herself and has done for many months now.

Thanks everyone who have mentioned reverse cycling. It's probably the pattern we are going to fall into if baby doesn't take milk from a cup!

@Blessedbethefruitz yesss it's our favourite position haha! I do wish I had a bed Io myself sometimes but I'm too lazy to wake up multiple times a night to feed when I can just cosleep.