Sexual exploitation

[icannotsay]

Sexual exploitation

Context

My dd is 11, nrly 12. She has adhd and asd. Please do not shoot me down for allowing my dd snap chat . I checked her phone every day and had no idea. I feel enough guilt already.

I have found out today that her number was linked to a snap chat acc and she has been sending nude pics, some explicit to males she believed were her age. They threatened to hurt her and her family if she didn't.

I feel absolutely ill. I have drummed all of this into her constantly and can't believe this has happened!.

I've called police but she is beside herself . She knows what she has done but no where near the extreme of it all.

I actually feel physically sick that grown men have her pictures.

Apart from never ever allowing her to be trusted with a phone again how the hell do I deal with this?

In terms of building up confidence ... What does your DD outside of school? I know a parent who deliberately enrols her kids on activities that aren't really in the catchment for the school they attend, so that if there are bullying issues at school these won't filter through to the activities and might be counterbalanced by the child having a positive time with entirely different children. I think this is quite a wise move and one I'm planning to emulate for DD as I can already see that she might be a target for bullying when she's at secondary.

Being part of a sports team/choir/guides group/indoor climbing pair for example can be a huge boost as it's brilliant to be part of something and often you'll find like-minded people there. If she doesn't have any interests I'd try a few ideas out.

My early secondary years were positively saved by the fact I was involved in music stuff where I was valued. There were also older kids in these groups and I felt a bit protected by them. And a close friend's DD was having a shit time at school at the hands of the dominant girls but ended up forging a brilliant social life through her swim club.

She has joined many sporting and other activities over the years she's done judo, swimming, football, drama classes, netball etc. She goes to rugby and netball at her new school.
She however doesn't stick with them for long.
She gets very tired from school as she masks loads.
She's in top set and I honestly don't know how she copes

At least at her new school she doesn't get a lot of homework. At her last school it was 7 to 10 pieces a day.
She can do and be whoever and whatever she wants.
She also believes she is bi-sexual so knows who she is but...
She just compares herself to others her age , who are a lot more mature. (She's one-off the smallest and youngest). She is also a but immature for her age.
She is also going through puberty.

I would not like to go back to her age again, I know that!

For some reason I can't get into my messages (tried and tried( do I perhaps need to be a premium member?

Ah! No, I don't think so - I'm not!

I did reply.

There endeth my Mumsnet knowledge! Did you get an email? You can open from there.

Hope you're feeling a little better this evening x

Scammers are like cockroaches these days, scuttling into every dark corner. Remember that story a while back about the fake tech support people preying on grandmas? Same kind of grimy tactics.

But here's the good news: Plesk is on top of it, and folks are sharing info to avoid these license landmines. Sharing resources like that https://digitalinvestigation.com/sextortion  is a great way to shine a light on these shady practices.

My take? Stick with reputable vendors and don't be afraid to double-check everything. If a deal seems too good to be true, it probably is. Better to be safe than shelling out hard-earned cash for snake oil.