Anyone get more stressed with kids when DH is around?

[mokebox]

I have two young kids and feel like I get more stressed, cranky and impatient with them when my DH is around. Does this resonate with anyone else?

I have often thought it was because I felt on high alert to hoe he would react to their behaviour and how Im handling them but now starting to wonder if it's also a little bit of resentment that I'm dealing with the stressful DC situations more regularly and it's actually him I'm cranky and impatient with??

Either way none of this seems fair on DC but just wondering if anyone else recognises this dynamic.

Can I make an assumption that your DH goes to work and is the main income earner 5+ days a week, and you're either stay at home mum or part time?

I'm that same cranky DH that gets easily irritated by my children, at much smaller things than my (stay at home) wife will. I convinced that this is because I'm around adults in an adult, professional environment all week and so the quick switch to home life on Saturday and Sunday is too much of a contrast to adjust to quickly - whereas my wife is used to the whining/whining/moaning all week.

Give us a break ladies!

@MrFriendZone I read your other thread and your updates made you sound like a reasonable man. What you have posted here does not.

Having had a break from the whinging/moaning (as you describe it) should leave you fresh and able to be patient when needed. Implying that because your wife has had to deal with it all week makes it easier for her.... that doesn't really make sense.

(Before you project anything onto me - I'm currently the main earner in our household. Working gives me a break and I find it easier to deal with family crises than if I've been with them all day)

OP, sorry to hear you feel like this. It doesn't sound great, I don't think it should be easier without your DH! Perhaps you should.parent a bit more separately - don't crowd each other, you take the kids out one day to give him a break, he takes them out the other day to give you a break. I LOVE better weather as DH finds it easier to manage out 3 outdoors, so I get much more time to relax when the sun is shining!

Yeah can't disagree, a lot of the comments on that thread (which was after this) have made me realise a few things. I think I've been thinking about things/approaching things all wrong. I can probably link a lot of this to how my dad was (and how my parent's relationship was) but that's a bit too deep and theoretical for me.

So yeah ignore my comment 😄

Yeah DH is much more patient than me because he gets to pee by himself and finish an ENTIRE cup of coffee while it was still hot.