DD doesn't like her Gran

[rootsandwings89]

I've just returned to work after 2nd child, my mum has moved closer to us and is very kindly looking after him so I don't have to pay nursery fees.

I also have an older DD who is 6. I stayed home with her until she turned 3 and we are very close family not used to having others around to help much.

My DD doesn't like me being back at work and openly sulks when my mum comes over to babysit. My mum is quite strict and a bit old school so they both clash.

Has anyone had similar experience? Any advice on how they can get closer?

I think give it more time. It sounds like a tricky transitional period and hopefully their relationship will improve over time.

You can come and talk to me when you stop shouting.

To me that's placing adult expectations on a toddler and punishing them for having feelings they can't manage. I'd just validate their feelings, comfort them and let them calm down naturally and then talk about how shouting isn't appropriate.

I find this idea that your Mum being strict and not terribly maternal is damaging to your DD a bit odd. She's 6 - bring strict is not the same as being unkind.

I think you've got a problem on your hands if your DD gets to dictate that the only adults she spends time with are ones who will let her do what she wants

Support both your mum and your DD, help them find a way to improve their relationship - it will be good for them both in the long run!